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Cboutin3 Posted 13 years ago
Grammar

Is this all worded correctly?

Shortly thereafter/afterward, Alhana met with Gilthas and the Qualinesti elves who had escaped from the doomed Qualinost, and the two leaders decided to join their forces together. A few weeks later, Samar returned to Silvanesti after meeting with the Solamnic Knight Gerard uth Mondar to inform Alhana that her son was a prisoner of the Dark Knights in Sanction. Alhana also discovered that the Solamnic Knights were preparing to attack the city and that the help of the elves would be appreciated. Once she learned this, Alhana and the unified elven army decided to march to Sanction to free Silvanoshei, but during the journey, they were attacked by a massive force of ogres.
  

Top answer

You do not need so many time markers. Alhana met with Gilthas and the Qualinesti elves who had escaped the doomed Qualinost, and the two leaders decided to join forces. After meeting with the Solamnic Knight Gerard uth Mondar, Samar returned to Silvanesti few weeks later to inform Alhana that her son was a prisoner of the Dark Knights in Sanction.

  • You do not need so many time markers.
  • Alhana met with Gilthas and the Qualinesti elves who had escaped the doomed Qualinost, and the two leaders decided to join forces.
  • After meeting with the Solamnic Knight Gerard uth Mondar, Samar returned to Silvanesti few weeks later to inform Alhana that her son was a prisoner of the Dark Knights in Sanction.
  • Alhana also discovered that the Solamnic Knights were preparing to attack the city and that the help of the elves would be appreciated .
  • Alhana and the unified elven army decided to march to Sanction to free Silvanoshei, but during the journey, they were attacked by a massive force of ogres.
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3 Answers
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You do not need so many time markers.

Alhana met with Gilthas and the Qualinesti elves who had escaped the doomed Qualinost, and the two leaders decided to join forces. After meeting with the Solamnic Knight Gerard uth Mondar, Samar returned to Silvanesti few weeks later to inform Alhana that her son was a prisoner of the Dark Knights in Sanction. Alhana a
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Thanks a lot. Does this option work for the middle sentence? A few weeks later, Samar returned to Silvanesti to inform Alhana that he had a meeting with the Solamnic Knight Gerard uth Mondar and that her son was a prisoner of the Dark Knights in Sanction.
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After meeting with the Solamnic Knight Gerard uth Mondar, Samar returned to Silvanesti a few weeks later to inform Alhana that her son was a prisoner of the Dark Knights in Sanction.

That is my sentence. I omitted 'a' in error.

A few weeks later, Samar returned to Silvanesti to inform Alhana that he had a meeting with the Solamnic Knight Gerard uth Mondar and th

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