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English_Learner Posted 19 years ago
TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS: Maria.
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Why are you late, Frank?
FRANK: Because of the sign.
TEACHER: What sign?
FRANK: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L"
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday, you said it's H to O.
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we
didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Gus, why do you always get so dirty?
GUS: 'Cause I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I."
MILLIE: I is...
TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, "I am."
MILLIE: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to. My Mom's a good cook.
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same
as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE: No, teacher, it's the same dog.
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking
when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher.
Jokes, Puzzles & Riddles
In the class
TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS: Maria.
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Why are you late, Frank?
FRANK: Because of the sign.
TEACHER: What sign?
FRANK: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L"
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday, you said it's H to O.
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we
didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Gus, why do you always get so dirty?
GUS: 'Cause I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I."
MILLIE: I is...
TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, "I am."
MILLIE: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to. My Mom's a good cook.
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same
as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE: No, teacher, it's the same dog.
_________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking
when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher.
Top answer
:) I really liked the second one!
- :) I really liked the second one!
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9 Answers
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The first!! It's unfair.
A litte secret: I discovered America. But don't say it anybody. They won't believe you!
A litte secret: I discovered America. But don't say it anybody. They won't believe you!
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Don't warry, I have one bright idea how to prove - !
I will say to everyone that you're someone who was born in 1451 in Italy, Genoa ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christopher_Columbus )
It's eeeeeeeeeasyyyyy, my friend!
So, let me count how old you're now
I will say to everyone that you're someone who was born in 1451 in Italy, Genoa ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christopher_Columbus )
It's eeeeeeeeeasyyyyy, my friend!
So, let me count how old you're now
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I'm 556. I discovered America. I lived during two world's wars. I've known Napoleon and I can tell you a lot of things about him. I saw Russian Tsars. I participated in Poltavskoe Battle. Petr1 was my friend. I'm not dead my death was nothing more than falsification. But now I have to study at school again... Oh my ***...! I scare to
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Prez1dent....But now I have to study at school again...... why?
Have you forgotten ev00
No. They don't belive that I'm 556. Young people! No shown respect to olders... Hehehe
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Thank u English Learner for these jokes. I like the first three ones they are hilarious.
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