IELTS writing task one

Hello, can anyone give me feedback on this second piece of work, I have done a check and is 152 words on this bar graph?

Thank you!

During the year 2003 and 2013, the pier chart provides information based on the online shopping sales arranged by sectors in New Zealand.

Overall, we can observe that the film/music sector made a significant part of the online sales; similarly, this case happened again, on the book group of the online sales which they increased. Nonetheless, the traveling sector decreased widely and so was the similar event with clothing.

If we analyze the chart carefully, we can observe that the book section of the online sales increased by 3% only; on 2013 the similar case was repeated with the film/music group which contributed the most significant part on the online sales by 12% on 2013.

We can observe that the section which suffered the most fluctuation on the online sales was clothing by 8% less than on 2003. However, after 2003 the traveling section as well suffered a significant decrease of 7% on the year 2013.