[IELTS Writing Task 2] Please Review The Essay For Me.

It is more important for school children to learn about local history than world history. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people claim that children should learn national history rather than world history because it is more important. Personally, I totally disagree with this view.

On the one hand, history of a country and history of the world have relationship sticking together, because national history is a vital factor which contributed to world history. If children only notice to history of their region or country, they would not have an overview as well as they would not understand external causes and results affecting that region or country. Therefore, they would have an incorrect view about historical events. For instance, in 1940, Japanese army had attacked Hai Phong and Hai Duong provinces where are partly territories of Vietnam. Vietnamese people resisted Japanese soldiers and reclaimed their sovereignty. The result is Vietnamese people had won the army of Japan and the authorities of Tran Trong Kim. These victories had helped to establish a new authority in 1945. If we did not concern about history of the world, we also did not know that the World War II was happening at that time. And the victory of Vietnam had the help of international friends especially Allies.

On the other hand, children should be equipped with relevant knowledge of historical world because it creates mutual understanding and community integration. Besides, children form their understanding about the origins and the past development of other people across the world. In other words, it is a way which helps to avoid cultural conflicts, ethnic conflicts and respects each other in the future.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that children should be taught world history as important as local history.