Ielts Writing Task 2 - Please help me to review mistakes

As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing.

What factors contribute to job satisfaction? How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?

Job satisfaction is generally an important goal for most of workers during their adult life because it is a dominant factor affecting their wellbeing in both working time and even their lifetime. But what contribute to job satisfaction and to what extent employees hope to satisfy at work is essential for each to clarify.

Firstly, the work environment is taken into account among majority of senior employees for seeking a job while salary and experience are two standards students prioritize. A student who just graduates from university yet is qualified to meet the job requirements will apply for non-experienced positions as they want to cultivated practical knowledge and improve their skills. Then after one or two year they may be more proficient with a higher income in their expectation, that makes them tend to change to work for another company if the current one cannot meet their desired salary. Secondly, adults targets on a stable career which bases on the promotion, because once they would be at the higher position workers are able to maintain their life with a firm point at the office and the sufficient finance.

The realistic prospect is ultimately the workers’ looking for during their career path. It can be defined that how well the job meet their life expectation. For instance, an entrepreneur strongly wants his company to develop business day by day so it is perfect for him that if his company’s revenue can increase every year. But for an officer barely earning money for a living and not being too busy at work in order to spend time being with his happy family is his meaningful destination.

The career is a long journey so job satisfaction is really important in which there are many elements contribute to. But to satisfy ourselves we should conceive obviously what we eventually expect and then fight for our realistic vision in our adult life at work.