IELTS WRITING TASK 2: Please help me

In some countries, people think women should have equality with men, in particular, equal rights to work as police officers or serve in the Army. Others think women are not suitable for such jobs. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Gender equality has been a popular issue in many countries. Some people argue that women should have the right to do male-dominated jobs such as police officers or army. Others suppose women should not have those kinds of occupations. In my opinion, both sexes have a fair chance at those jobs.
First of all, many people think women are not suitable to become a police officer or serve in the Army. That is because it takes a great deal of physical strength as well as mental health to do such jobs, whereas the weaker sex has usually been considered to be vulnerable and fragile. Moreover, police or army troops always have to be tremendously brave, determined, and decisive while women can hardly own those characters. Therefore, it is undeniable that men are more suitable for such jobs than women.
However, it would be better if we give women a fair chance to try those occupations. Although only the stronger sex is capable of providing enough physical power and showing great bravery, the other sex still has certain strengths that are useful for those areas of jobs. Their maternal instincts, intense sympathy, and psychological abilities can really help in certain circumstances. For example, when the criminal is a young teenager, the female police can easily talk to him and sympathize with him, therefore, they can understand the real motive and get him to tell the truth.
In conclusion, societies had better encourage more women to join in those male-dominated jobs to make full use of their abilities.