IELTS Writing task 2. Please give me feedback and advice. Thank you very much.
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
These days, a majority of food and beverage commodities cause various health consequences because of their high levels of sugar. Thus, it is suggested that the government should raise the prices of sugary products in order to prevent customers from using too much sugar. As far as I am concerned, I also endorse the view that to discourage people to consume sugar, it is vital to increase sugary products' prices.
The first and foremost reason for this is because it could avoid individuals from many serious health issues. To be specific, many researches prove that using sugar is not good because it not only makes people addicted to it but also brings consequences to their health. For example, people are easily prone to obesity when eating processed food including snacks and cheese. As a result, if the prices of food and drink commodities are escalated, sugar consumption will significantly reduce.
In addition to the reason above, it is also thought that making sugary products more expensive could change customer buying behavior. In fact, there are so many manufactures utilize sugar since it is cheap and delicious, and thus their products also have reasonable prices. That is the reason why a variety of users purchase these kinds of products. Consequently, when raising the prices of products containing sugar, customers would be encouraged to change their opt and concentrate on cheaper products which might be healthier.
To conclude, because sugary products including processed food and soft drink lead to a plenty of health problems, many people believe that the government should escalate their prices to stop many individuals from using more sugar. Personally, I totally agree with this suggestion.
Top answer
These days, a majority of food and beverages commodities (A commodity is something sold wholesale in bulk like barrels of oil, bushels of wheat, and bales of cotton. They are sold on the commodities markets. ) cause various health consequences because of their high levels of sugar.
- These days, a majority of food and beverages commodities (A commodity is something sold wholesale in bulk like barrels of oil, bushels of wheat, and bales of cotton.
- They are sold on the commodities markets.
- ) cause various health consequences because of their high levels of sugar.
- ) Thus, it is suggested that the government should raise the prices of sugary products in order to prevent customers from eating using too much sugar.
- As far as I am concerned, I also endorse the view that to discourage people to consume sugar, it is vital to increase sugary products' prices.
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These days, a majority of food and beverages commodities (A commodity is something sold wholesale in bulk like barrels of oil, bushels of wheat, and bales of cotton. They are sold on the commodities markets. ) cause various health consequences because of their high levels of sugar. (Do you really think that the majority of things we eat and drink are high in sugar?) T
0It is true that we can find many processed food and drink items containing high sugar contents. This has caused many people to gain health issues. While some people argue that the price of these sugary products should be increased in order to discourage people from taking more sugar, I personally disagree with this opinion.
I find raising the price of sugary products is simply unrea
0
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