IELTS writing task 2 - Please correct my new essay

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together.

To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion

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Music is always one of the effectively popular methods to connect people to people no matter what culture they belong to. Nevertheless, some other people argue that there are many different ways of making people be closer. This essay gives some opposite arguments and examples to indicate the differences and show my opinion.

On the one hand, music is used as a perfect tool to spread beautifully cultural points out of the territory. Nice rhythms of songs can completely erase all barriers between people and people, countries and countries. For instance, a global phenomenon name Despacito, a vibrant Latin song by Luis Fonsi, creates a trend in all destinations it comes to. People dance and sing enthusiastically whenever Despacito’s melody is played without understanding the language of the song, which is specifically unambiguous evidence of language barrier removing.

On the other hand, music is not the only way to share feelings and people have more than one effective tool for communicating. Another way, the cinematography is given as an alternative method of entertainment. For example, many famous movies such as Titanic, Avatar, Endgame were made by cinematically using lively photos and progressive technology to describe the backgrounds of the stories that they tell about. In this way, these movies rouse the curiousness of people no matter who and no matter where they are, which makes people come to the cinema to watch those blockbuster movies efficiently. Besides, manufacturers make a combination of film and song themes, which help viewers enjoy the movies more emotionally.

To conclude from the aforementioned arguments, I certainly disagree with the idea that music is the better way to bring people together. I believe in the achievements of the cinematic industry and this subject may become the more effective method to make people be closer.