[IELTS Writing Task 2] Help me correct and score this essay please!

Universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is true that men and women have different qualities. Despite these seeming stereotypes, many universities are gradually allowing every subject to have the same number of students in both genders. I totally agree with this change.

In the first place, universities had better respect everyone’s interest and abilities. Undoubtedly, not all girls or boys have similar hobbies and biases, which mainly depend on their personalities and living environment. For example, a girl born in a martial-art-tradition family may have an orientation towards army universities. Moreover, a boy loving kids might want to major in kindergarten pedagogy. Therefore, to take full advantage of a person’s talent, educators should never restrict their propensity and taste.

What is more, male and female students together can create a comfortable and exciting study environment. It is said that each sex has its specific characteristics. In particular, while boys tend to be open-minded and funny, girls are sensitive and detailed sometimes. Thanks to the balance between them, the field can be studied and analyzed through different methods, so the lessons’ effectiveness will be enhanced.

To summarize, both girls and boys ought to be given the same amount of opportunity in every subject in university. I strongly advocate that gender should not be a barry for their skills and aptitudes to shine.