IELTS WRITING TASK 2. Can you please check my essay? Thank you for your help

Task 2: Some young people look forward to a year of travelling, a ‘gap year’, before they begin work or university and see it as a chance to broaden their horizons. For other this is an expensive waste of time. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In some countries, youngsters are encouraged to take a gap year before entering the workforce or going to university because it is a golden opportunity to enrich their knowledge. Conversely, some people consider it as an extravagant, time-consuming practice. From my outlook, I believe that a year of travelling is an intrinsic part of students’ work and study because it has numerous of merits and just a minute of demerits.

It is undeniable that students can benefit from various aspects by taking a year off. Firstly, a sabbatical offers pupils an insight into their future occupations. Stated differently, youngsters can work as tutors or apprentices in order to learn indispensable techniques such as observation, co-operation, communication as well as develop working spirit. As an illustration, according to a study in 2018, a massive 85% of high-school graduates in Denmark decided to be on sabbatical instead of going to colleges.

Furthermore, the young stand a good chance of socializing and experiencing life by joining charitable organizations. If young people work as volunteers in orphanages or nursing homes to assist cared-for children and the elderly, they will sympathize with unfortunates and act responsibly with others.

By contrast, the significant drawback of such a break is it can be a distraction from further education. This means that some students, especially who are lack of self-determination and self-awareness may go on spontaneous, luxury holidays without supervision of parents. Consequently, they are not willing to enter universities and likely to drop out of schools.

In conclusion, only when high-school students take well planned sabbaticals, can they flourish career interest and moral obligation. From my perspective, schools and parents should teach youngsters how to plan and manage their own gap years so as to have an accurate perception of those breaks. (295 words)