IELTS Writing Task 2
Please help me to check and correct this essay. Thank you so much.
Popular events like the football world cup and other international sporting
occasions are essential in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic emotions in a safe way.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
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To me, as a huge sporting fan, I think that some international sporting events such as football World Cup and Olympic Sports not only can impact the relationships between countries around the World but also are occasions people have chances to show their nationalism in a proper way.
Sporting occasions are considered to have great effects on world peace. As I know, World Cup could be deemed an apparatus maintaining world peace and to show patriotism in a secure way. In that worldwide tournament, various countries in the world will compete with other. After experiencing many rounds, the winner will award a cup that brings great honor to their country. Nevertheless these countries are at war or not, athletes will shake their hands in every match and compete with high spirits. As a result, tensions between these nations could be released. The athletes will try their best to win the game, and the fans will promote them with all their hearts. That show their patriotic emotions in the correct way, even when their national team win or not.
Besides the positive effects, there always present some negative ones. If nationalism showed in a wrong way, it would boost world tensions. In certain cases, athletes and supporters could not get their emotions under control. In match, they had aggressive behavior, then fought against each other. In my view, it can be called patriotism because some people would be hurt and it causes more intensions between nations.
In conclusion. I personally agree with this statement, but athletes and supporters should comprehend and realize which actions or thoughts truly show patriotism. If they could control their emotions, popular sporting events would be essential in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic emotions in a safe way.
Top answer
To me, as a huge sports sporting fan, I think that some international sporting sports events such as football 's World Cup and the Olympic Games Sports not only can impact the relationships between countries around the W orld but also are occasions where people have a chance chances to show their nationalism in a proper way. ) on world peace. ) maintaining world peace and to show patriotism in a secure way.
- To me, as a huge sports sporting fan, I think that some international sporting sports events such as football 's World Cup and the Olympic Games Sports not only can impact the relationships between countries around the W orld but also are occasions where people have a chance chances to show their nationalism in a proper way.
- ) on world peace.
- ) maintaining world peace and to show patriotism in a secure way.
- In that worldwide tournament, various countries in the world will compete with other .
- ) that brings great honor to their country.
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To me, as a huge sports sporting fan, I think that some international sporting sports events such as football's World Cup and the Olympic
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