IELTS Writing Task 2

Hi, I'm hoping for some comments on my essay written for the IELTS Writing Task 2. If you have some free time, please help me. Many thanks!

Topic: The internet has dramatically altered our lives over the past few decades. Although some of these changes have been negative, the overall effect of this technology has been positive. What are your opinions on this?

Essay:

"In recent decades, the world has witnessed the booming of the internet, which has resulted in numerous transformation in people’s lives. While the majority of them are significant, there remains some minor side effects.

To begin with, the internet has brought magnificent innovations to the way people interact. On the contrary to the early times, when getting in touch with people was time-consuming and frustrating, people now can communicate with just a click of a button. We now can send e-mails and have instant reply rather than using the traditional post service, for instance.

By the same token, people have benefited greatly from the internet, regarding doing research. The internet provides us with whole-time accessible knowledge, which saves us the time spending on going to the library and flicking through pages of books.

Admittedly, despite the given pros, the net can actually do harm to its frequent users. With the development of the net, human interaction rate has been recorded to shrink as more time is being spent on sitting in front of computer’s screen. This has posted a threat of isolation to internet users.

In sum, it is an indisputable fact that the internet has greatly rovlutionized human world. As every coin has two sides, some flaws still exist. However, I personally feel the assurance that sociallogists can manage to solve them."