Ielts Writing Task 1 (T4.C5). Please Help Me Check.

Question

The table shows some details about subterranean rail systems which in six cities around the world.

The table compares the six networks in terms of their age, size and the number of people who use them each year. It is clear that the three oldest underground systems are larger and serve significantly passengers than newer systems.

The oldest rail track was built in London which is also the longest track compared to other routes in the table. It also carries the third high number of passengers each year, while the number of passengers using underground train systems in Tokyo and Paris is at the highest positions, 1927 persons and 1191 persons respectively.

Three newest systems were smaller and carries less passengers per year than the others. The routes opened in Kyoto and Los Angeles are the newest but the quantities of annual passengers using these routes are significantly less, especially in Kyoto, with only 45 persons each year.

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

The table shows some details about subterranean (This word is never used for railroads except for those in coal mines.) rail systems which in six cities around the world. (The next sentence should be used as your first paragraph. It repeats what you wrote here.)

The table compares

The table compares ~~the~~ six urban underground rail systems ~~networks~~ in terms of their age, size and the number of people who use them each year.

~~It is clear that~~ (That is an opinion. Do not write opinions in Task 1.) The three oldest underground systems are larger and serve significantly (missing word - "significantly passengers" is incorrect English.) passengers than the newer systems.

The oldest ~~rail track~~ was built in London which is also the longest track (There is more than one track in the system.) compared to other routes in the table. It also carries the third high (wrong form) number of passengers each year, while the number of passengers ~~using underground train systems~~ (You do not need to repeat this. The reader knows what you are talking about.) in Tokyo and Paris is at the highest positions, 1927 persons (That is incorrect.) and 1191 persons respectively.

Three newest systems were (stick to present tense.) smaller and carries less (wrong word) passengers per year than the others. The routes ~~opened~~ in Kyoto and Los Angeles are the newest but the quantities (wrong word) of annual passengers using these routes are significantly less, especially in Kyoto, with only 45 persons each year. (That is less than one person per week! This system should be out of business because only one person in a week uses it!)

Some general points you might think about:

Three of the systems are in capital cities: London, Paris and Tokyo.
Two are in the US, two in Japan, and two (the oldest) in Europe.
The largest system (London) is more than thirty times larger than the smallest (Kyoto) in terms of its route length.

The oldest system is over 150 years old, the newest less than 20 years old.
Tokyo's system is the most congested and Washington's is the least.

Gray paint 587 · Answer

The given is tabular chart comparing data about subway systems of six mega cities in world.(London, Paris,Tokyo,Washington DC,Kyoto and Los Angeles).Units are measured in years, kilometres and millions.
Overall, The undergrounds were chronologically ordered and distance of them is put in descending order. The table starts with London metro and finished with information about Los Angeles underground railway system. The number of passengers per year is not given like above.
Exactly, metropolitane of London was built in 1863 and it is the oldest, of course the longest line(394 km) among them.This underground system serves to 775 million passengers in each year.
That is the significance, next four subways were opened in XX century, 1900,1927,1976,1981 respectively. The Paris metro line is considered the longest line with 199 km while Kyoto ha only 11 km. But only two of them Paris and Tokyo subway systems can deliver more than thousand people per year. Only Los Angeles underground among them which can serve 50 million users per year was launched in the second year of current century.The length of this line is 28 km.

Ielts Writing Task 1 (T4.C5). Please Help Me Check.

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