IELTS WRITING TASK 1: Line graph

Question

The graph bellow compares changes in the birth rates of China and USA between 1920 and 2000.Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.Write at least 150 words.The line graph illustrates the differences between changes in birth rates of two nations – the USA and China from 1920 to 2000. Overall, both countries experienced a downward trend throughout the frame time. In general, the percentage of American birth rate was much higher than that of China.As can be seen from the graph, the birth rate of the USA stood at 10% in 1920, then fluctuating around above 10% from 1920 to 1940 before hitting the lowest point of below 5% in the following decade. Afterward, the birth rate in American significantly increased from below 5% to exactly 15% in 1950, but then subsequently had fallen to under 10% by the year 2000.Regarding China, there were fluctuations in the figure for China between in the 20s to 30s, which was followed by a considerable drop to 5% in 1940 and remaining to 1945. In the same year with the USA, the birth rate in China reached the highest point of 20% in 1950.  The Chinese birth rate, however, sharply decreased the latter year, then falling to around 3% in 2000.(184 words)P/s: Please check and give your opinion. I really appreciate any comment of you. Thank you so much! Have a nice day!

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

Please attach an image of what you are writing about. We cannot help you if we can't see the figure.

Also, please read this about vocabulary words that you have used incorrectly.

Vocabulary Words For Task 1: Reference Post

Kevinn · Answer

This is the graph of my question. I feel bad for my absent-mindedness. (( Sorry.

AlpheccaStars · Answer

Kevinn Please check and give your opinion. I really appreciate any comments from of you.

Please read my general advice for Task 1: IELTS TASK 1: Hints, Tips And Advice

You, like many other students, would benefit from it. Several of the highlighted errors are described in that short article.

The line graph illustrates (wrong word. Use illustrate for pictures and diagrams, not graphs and charts.) the differences between changes in birth rates of two nations – the USA and China from 1920 to 2000. Overall, both countries experienced a downward trend throughout the frame time. In general, the percentage of American birth rate (wrong expression) was much higher than that of China.

(The underlined sentences above should be in paragraph 2. It would improve the coherence and cohesion score. Also you need to give the correct units of measure; it is not percentage.)

~~As can be seen from the graph,~~ The birth rate of the USA stood at 10% (wrong units) in 1920, then fluctuating (wrong word) around above 10% from 1920 to 1940 before hitting the lowest point of below 5% (Imprecise. 2%, 1% and 3.5% are all below 5%) in the following decade. Afterward, the birth rate in American significantly increased from below 5% to exactly 15% (wrong units) in 1950, but then subsequently had fallen to under 10% (wrong units) by the year 2000.

Regarding China, there were fluctuations in the figure for China between in the 20s to 30s, which was followed by a considerable drop to 5% in 1940 and remaining to 1945. In the same year with the USA, the birth rate in China reached the highest point of 20% (wrong units) in 1950. The Chinese birth rate, however, sharply decreased the latter year, then falling to around 3% (wrong units) in 2000.

IELTS WRITING TASK 1: Line graph

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