IELTS Writing Task 1 diagram essay! All feedbacks are appreciated.

Question

The diagram shows the procedure for university entry for high school graduates.

Write a report for a university or college lecturer describing the information.

You should write at least 150 words.

The diagram gives an oversight of the process of entering a university.

Overall, the process leads to two different possible outcomes.

The procedure begins as students obtain their high school degree. Firstly, they will have to fill in an application form which they can get from the university's website. Then they will send that form to the admin, who will assess and either accept or reject their application. Further documentation may be required, in which case the student will have 2 weeks to compile the needed documents and send them to the admin.

If the student is accepted, they will be given 2 weeks to complete their enrolment.After that, they will select their subjects and register with the Dean to be given the university entrance.

Incase the student's application is rejected, they can either do an application for alternative course and repeat the process from sending to the administrator, or abandon the effort to enter the given university.

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

Please attach an image of what you are writing about. We cannot help you if we can't see the figure.

Attach an image in a post

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Please read my advice for Task 1 essays:

IELTS TASK 1: Hints, Tips And Advice

Vocabulary Words For Task 1: Reference Post

AlpheccaStars · Answer

The diagram gives an oversight (wrong word. Oversight is governance or a mistake made when you do not pay attention to something.) of the process of entering a university.

Here is a better opening. The precise name of this type of figure is a "flow chart." The names of possible figures for Task 2 are given in my advice posts.

The flow chart illustrates the registration process for a university.

Overall, the process leads to two different possible outcomes - successful and unsuccessful applications.

The procedure begins as prospective (The person is not a student until after they get accepted. They are either an applicant or a prospective student.) students obtain their high school degree. ~~Firstly~~, First, they will have to fill in an application form which they can get from the university's website. Then they will send that form to the admin, who will ~~assess and~~ either accept or reject their application. If it is not rejected, further documentation may be required, in which case they ~~student~~ will have two 2 (Write out small numbers in words.) weeks to compile the needed documents and send them to the admin. This last step can be repeated until the administration is satisfied that they have all the required information. They will then either accept or reject the application.

If the prospective student is accepted, they will be given 2 weeks to complete their enrolment.After that, they will select their subjects and register with the Dean; at that point, they can start their education. ~~to be given the university entrance~~.

Incase the ~~student's~~ application is rejected, they can either ~~do an application~~ apply for an alternative course and repeat the application process ~~from sending to the administrator,~~ or abandon the effort to enter the given university.

IELTS Writing Task 1 diagram essay! All feedbacks are appreciated.

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