IELTS Writing task 1

Question

The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.The graph shows the population aged 65 and beyond between the years 1940 and 2040 in Japan, Sweden, andthe USA.In the year 1940, the population of older people in three countries was between 5% to 8%. Japan was the lowest and USA was the highest. The population was normally rising, but in the year 1980, the community of the older from USA and Sweden rise but Japan has decrease compare to 40 years ago.Around the year 2028, the society of 65 years and beyond suddenly increase, and it becomes between 10% to 20%, still Japan has the lowest old population between two other countries. Two years later, the proportion increases by 15%, and it becomes equal to Sweden.In the last year of the graph, Japan becomes the first country in the old population, and it rises 5% in 10 years. Also, the population of older adults becomes 25% in Sweden. Moreover, the USA with a difference of 9% from Japan becomes the third country that has an aged society.(I would be appreciated if you could give me a score based on IELTS exams.)

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

The graph shows the percentage of the population aged 65 or older ~~and beyond~~ (unnatural) between the years 1940 and 2040 in Japan, Sweden, and the USA.

(You need to have a paragraph here with two or three "main features". That responds to the task instructions "select and report the main features."

Please read my advice for Task 1 essays:

IELTS TASK 1: Hints, Tips And Advice

Vocabulary Words For Task 1: Reference Post

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In the year 1940, the population of older people in these three countries (You must have a determiner - the or these to identify the three you are describing. "Three countries" can be any in the world.) was between 5% to 8%. Japan was the lowest and USA was the highest. The population was normally rising, but in the year 1980, the community of the older (unnatural, incorrect) from USA and Sweden rise but Japan has decrease compare (ungrammatical) to 40 years ago.
Around the year 2028, the society of 65 years and beyond (unnatural, incorrect) suddenly increase, (You should not use present tense for events that not yet happened. You missed a very important point for this task.) and it becomes between 10% to 20%, still Japan has the lowest old population between two other countries. (You must have a determiner - the or these to identify the three you are describing. "two other countries" can be any in the world.) Two years later, the proportion increases by 15%, and it becomes equal to Sweden.
In the last year of the graph, Japan becomes (You should not use present tense for events that not yet happened.) the first country in the old population, (unnatural expression) and it rises 5% in 10 years. Also, the population of older adults becomes 25% in Sweden. Moreover, the USA with a difference of 9% from Japan becomes the third country that has an aged society. (incorrect expression)

It is a very bad idea to use synonyms in task 1. Expressions very rarely have exactly the same meaning, and for a math/science context, precision, accuracy and exactness is most important.

Next, it is not good to use present tense for future years. A period spanning past, present and future is common in Task 1 tests, so you must learn how to deal with this situation.

If you would like a sample essay to study, you may ask for one.

IELTS Writing task 1

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