IELTS Writing Task 1

Question

Can you check for me, please! Thank you very much.

The line chart illustrates the changes in the number of book club members as well as the amount of money given to these clubs by a city council over a four-year period.

In year 1, the city council donated £20.000, and there were 6,000 clubs members. Then, it increased steadily to £25.000 in the second year. However, in the same year period, the number of book club members decreased slightly, from 6,000 to 5,000 members.

In the third year, it particular upward trend continued for the following year and it reached a peaked at £40.000. There was also a sharp rise in the number of book club members. In the fourth year, when a city council tried to went down the amount of money to 30.000, the book club members went up sharply to 12.500.

Overall, it is obvious that there was a fluctuation contribution from a city to the book and it provides an upward trend for a number of books club members over the period.

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

Thanh H?i Nguy?n 5731Can you check for me, please! Thank you very much.

The line chart ~~illustrates~~ shows / plots ~~the changes in~~ the number of book club members as well as the amount of money given to these clubs by a city council over a four-year period.

In year 1, the city council donated £20.000, and there were 6,000 ~~clubs~~ club members. Then the donations , it increased steadily to £25.000 in the second year. However, ~~in the same year period,~~ the number of book club members decreased slightly, from 6,000 to 5,000 members.

In the third year, ~~it particular~~ the upward trend continued for the following year and it reached a peaked (wrong form) at £40.000. There was also a sharp rise in the number of book club members. In the fourth year, when a the city council tried to went down (??) the amount of money to 30.000, the number of book club members went up sharply to 12.500.

Overall, it is obvious that there was a variation in the ~~fluctuation~~ contributions from a city to the book (Did a city contribute to a book?) and it provides an upward trend for a number of books club members over the period.

Comment:

Some numbering systems use a period (dot) to separate thousands, and a comma to indicate a decimal point.
In the US, our numbering system uses a comma to separate thousands, and a period (dot) to indicate a decimal point.
The line graph uses the US numbering system, so you should use it in your essay. At least be consistent and don't mix them up in the same essay.

It would be better to have one paragraph for the amounts, and a second for the numbers. Then you can use pronouns instead of repeating the noun phrases.

The amount given to the book clubs in year 1 was £20,000. This increased by 25% (£5,000) to £25,000 in year 2. In year 3, it was double that of year 1, (£40,000) but was followed by a decrease of £5,000 in year 4, ending at £35,000. The net increase in funding over the period was 75%.

The number of book club members also increased over the four years, by 100%. In year 1, it started at 6,000 but decreased to 5,000 in year 2. From year 2 to year 3, the membership doubled to 10,000 and it increased another 20% to 12,000 in year 4.

Overall, the amount given to the book clubs by the city council on a per-member basis ranged from a little under £3 to £4.

IELTS Writing Task 1

Top answer

Get the Weekly English Kit 📬

Related Questions