IELTS task 2 topic - problem awareness

I am a newbie here. 1 month later I will take the IELTS exam, so I would like you to have a look at my recent exercise. Thank you so much.

Topic:
Young people are much more aware of and concerned about issues like the environment, poverty, and animal welfare than previous generations. What is your own opinion?

Answer:
A commonly held belief is that problems happening in society today, such as the environment or welfare for animals are recognized better by the young generation than the older one . I partly agree with this statement because of some reasons.

On one hand, it is obvious that young people are exposed to a vast amount of information about these issues from many sources such as social networks, online newspapers or friends. Thanks for the power of media, they will have the feeling of being involved and having to take some responsibilities for a better world . One case in point is the “Earth hour” activity – which has been spread over more than 200 countries by people under 30 years old in just one week through Facebook. Meanwhile, those elderly people who do not spend too much time surfing the internet will not be influenced by campaigns which are created by the media.

On the other hand, although not being affected by the media or having much knowledge about world wide problems, citizens who come from the previous generation tent to carry out many practical solutions daily or weekly . For example, Alan Woo, who is the director of an architecture firm often spends his weekend on cleaning public parks by collecting and sorting waste simply because he likes fresh air and pure environment . Different from young people who usually follow the crowd, actions of experienced people come from what they really want to do in their life, hence they will bring long term and functional results for society.

In conclusion, we can not deny the fact that nowadays, young generation have more opportunities to understand about the issues that human have to face, but aged habitants have their own ways to solve those problems practically.