Ielts task 2: Pls help me to correct this essay

Question: Some high schools have a requirement that students must complete a certain amount of volunteer work in order to graduate. What do you think about this type of requirement? Give details to support your opinion.

Answer:

These days, some high schools require student to finish an amount of volunteer work before graduating. In my opinion, I completely disagree with this requirement.

In general, doing volunteer works has certain advantages. Firstly, it shows that students have a number of life skills. In greater details, they are communicating, dealing with problems and giving solutions. On top of it, volunteer works help students to gain practical experiences outside the school. Thanks to these activities, students can have the opportunities to learn new things and make friends with people that they do not know before.

However, I do think that it is not necessary for students to do volunteer works at high school. In reality, not every student is able to do a volunteer work. Due to health problems or part-time jobs, some students do not have enough time to participate in volunteer activities. In addition to that, these works can have a bad effect on the academic results. For instance, if students focus on volunteering too much, they may neglect their studies and find it difficult to pass the exams. Last but not least, volunteer works may cause a lot of troubles that are not easy to solve. To face up with them, students have to accept the fact that they may lose much of their money, their health, and their precious time.

In conclusion, although volunteer works is beneficial to students in terms of their character growth, it is not the thing that high schools should take into consideration in the graduation process.