IELTS TASK 2. Help me check it. I appreciate it!!!

Some people think that in this modern world people are dependent on each other, while others think the modern world gets people more independent of each other. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.In this modern world, people have sparked a controversy over whether they are more or less dependent on others. I believe that people may depend on others in some aspect and simultaneously, be independent in others. However, in general, humans are still highly social that we still need others in our lives.The rationale behind the dependency is that life is becoming increasingly expensive and competitive that an individual cannot sail through without others, especially their parents. In the past, people tended to drop out of school and go to work at an early age. As life was much cheaper back then, they could be able to lead their own lives. However, nowadays, the cost of living is extremely high while the job market is very competitive. Hence, people have to live off their parents until they can gain a degree or specialized skills to find a job with a decent salary. Thus, they live dependently on their parents for a much longer time.Others who think people are more independent might argue that with the advent of technology, people now can do many things that they used to have done by others. It might be illustrated by the fact that nowadays, people tend to live in an immediate family instead of in an extended one. In the past, they lived together to support others in work or household chores. It is not the case for now as family’ members often have different occupations, and many household appliances can assist them in many tasks. For example, vacuums or washing machine has brought people much convenience. Therefore, people now don’t really need the help of others.Although there is some truth in this, this complete independence is mitigated by the fact that even people live more individually, they still depend on others to some extent. For instance, those who already got married still turn to their parents to support them in taking care of their children.In conclusion, it is observed that people’s lives are becoming both dependent and independent. But all in all, they still need the support of others to lead a happy life.