Ielts practice

Hello everyone, i need your helps.

I did my homework, but still have a little bit about the grammar mistake. pls help me. Thank u , all , a lot.

Task 2: In the modern world, people find it no longer necessary to use food from animals or product from animals such as medicine and clothing. Do you agree or disagree ?

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It is evident that, according to the significant development of science and technology, many useful substances had been created. As a result, the huge number of citizens hold the belief that it is worthless in consuming some goods from animals such as food ,medicine and clothing. personally, my sentiment is on par with this above statement due to the humane relationship between human and animals and the replacement of other things. this essay will give some analysis to support for my opinion.

There is no doubt that, the modern life have some more practical substances created , which can completely substitute some commodities from animals in living standard. In fact, the ingredients from animals almost is used in the common or luxuries good , therefore, their disappearance closely cause some adverse effects to daily basis activities. Meanwhile, the researches recently have discovered many chemicals or materials which have uses nearly the same with the substances gained from animals in good manufacturing. As a result, the commodities have origin from animals should be replaced gradually. For instance, after artificial fur had made successfully, the huge amount of company decided stopping using real fur from animals to decorate for their goods.

It is worth noting that, the humane relationship between human and animals are usually mentioned whenever the death of animals serving for the demand of citizen. In fact, the issue of protecting animals, specially wild animals always capture special attention from the Governments in worldwide because of the alarming rate of endangered animals statistic. With the enormous profits gained from owning some special part of animals, as well as namely the high price , in order to reach them some pp even violate the law such as: illegal hunting , smuggling and so on. Those activities can cause society disorder, therefore, instead of stopping using animals to produce commodities, the society escapes from some noticeable risks .

To conclude, i believe that using animals as ingredients of life is not essential in modern life, obviously , we can have peaceful and healthy life with some small friends- the animals.