IELTS GT Task 2: Please review and provide feedback

Topic:

In modern times, young adults are spending less time with their families and more time with their friends. Why his this change occurred? Do you think parents should force their children to spend more time at home?

Essay:

Today many adolescents and teenagers prefer to spend more time with their friends instead of their families. In my opinion, its primal reason is that parents give insufficient time to children and, they must compel their children to spend more time at home.

The main reason why children are spending more time with their friends is that every family member, especially parents, is busy in their life and do not have enough time to talk and listen to their children. Everyone is running after money and status and feel peer pressure in their occupation. They believe that spending time with siblings and children is a sheer waste of a precious resource. Therefore, most teenagers opt to spend less time with their families. Most of the parents in Bangladesh, for example, do overtime at their offices and hardly spend time with their children. Thus, these children mostly stay at their friends' house.

As far as compelling children to spend considerable time at home is concerned, I completely agree with this opinion. By doing this, children would realize the importance of family values and learn to respect the each member of the family. What they learn in childhood would stay with them for the rest of their lives. According to a recent study, for instance, both father and mother have a strong bonding with a child in India. This is because both spouses talk and listen to their children considerably. Thus, this evidence supports that young adults should be forced to spend substantial amount of time at home.

In conclusion, a lack of time with parents for their children is the main reason why they spend more time with their friends. I think children should be compelled to stay more at home so that they can learn about family values.