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Anonymous Posted 15 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing
I wrote a two paragraphs of a story. I was wondering if you can correct the mistakes that are there.
The Family who never was!
Wake up!, Wake up!someone shouted as i was just having a good dream. Children wake up! my mother said. But the dream
I was having was amazing even if i don't remeber i knew it was something amazing. That might sound strange but, don't you ever get the
feeling that when you have a great experience subconsiounly.The feeling of that experience is transfered to your consious ."Daniell!......Wake up or else your sister will have your stars as well!"Mother said in a sly manner. "Ok! mum i,ll be right there" I shouted back.
I quickly threw the duvet off, which was wrapped around me. I then ran downstairs to the dining room my thought and body were one
because the only thing i didn't want was for my snotty litte sister to take one of my golden stars. I jumped the stairs two by two as i had
my mum counting down "9.8.7.6.5". I arrived on before my mother was on 3 and shouted "safe!".
Wake up!, Wake up!someone shouted as i was just having a good dream. Children wake up! my mother said. But the dream
I was having was amazing even if i don't remeber i knew it was something amazing. That might sound strange but, don't you ever get the
feeling that when you have a great experience subconsiounly.The feeling of that experience is transfered to your consious ."Daniell!......Wake up or else your sister will have your stars as well!"Mother said in a sly manner. "Ok! mum i,ll be right there" I shouted back.
I quickly threw the duvet off, which was wrapped around me. I then ran downstairs to the dining room my thought and body were one
because the only thing i didn't want was for my snotty litte sister to take one of my golden stars. I jumped the stairs two by two as i had
my mum counting down "9.8.7.6.5". I arrived on before my mother was on 3 and shouted "safe!".
Top answer
Hi, The Family That Never Was! "Wake up! ", someone shouted as I was just having a good dream.
- Hi, The Family That Never Was!
- "Wake up!
- ", someone shouted as I was just having a good dream.
- ", my mother said.
- But the dream I was having was amazing.
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1 Answers
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Hi,
The Family That Never Was!
"Wake up! Wake up!", someone shouted as I was just having a good dream. "Children wake up!", my mother said. But the dream I was having was amazing. Even if I didn't remember, I knew it was something amazing. That might sound strange but, don't you ever get that feeling when you have a great experience subconscious? The
The Family That Never Was!
"Wake up! Wake up!", someone shouted as I was just having a good dream. "Children wake up!", my mother said. But the dream I was having was amazing. Even if I didn't remember, I knew it was something amazing. That might sound strange but, don't you ever get that feeling when you have a great experience subconscious? The
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