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Anonymous Posted 17 years ago
Grammar
I need to go to court. Could you help with this?
Honorable Judge XXX,
I am the mother of Dennis. I would like to express my sincerest regret concerning the latest incident, which came as a shock since Dennis has been making great strides in improving his schoolwork and his outlook on life--as can be attested by the submitted progress reports issued by the high school he is currently attending.
On the day of the second incident, my son went to an arcade in Bayside with a couple of friends and later proceeded to a nearby restaurant to grab a bite. But he quickly left the premises after being told that the plaintiff was also inside the same restaurant. Once outside, he called me to pick him up since he did not want to violate the restraining order against him. Unfortunately my son's limited understanding of the law misled him to believe he was in compliance so long as there was a spatial separation between himself and the plaintiff. Furthermore, he was unware at the time that the situation was worsened by his friends' summonning other friends on the phone while he was waiting outside. My son now understands better that restraining order means staying away at all times and in all situations (even happenstances), and he has assured me that he won't go back to his old neighborhood.
Your Honor, please understand that I would not be writing this letter in behalf of my son had I not seen visible improvement in my son while he was on parole. The changes in my son's attitude and schoolwork in the past few months have been genuine, and as mother I could not be any happier, were it not for this mishap.
As a side note, Dennis was unable to visit his dad, whom he gets to see only two months out of the year, in Georgia this past summer. It pained me to see him spend the summer in the detention center, knowing how much Dennis loves being with his Dad.
Honorable Judge! Dennis was well on his way to becoming a law-abiding, productive citizen in a new environment, and I give you my word that I will continue to nurture and guide him in the right direction.
Yours truly,
I am the mother of Dennis. I would like to express my sincerest regret concerning the latest incident, which came as a shock since Dennis has been making great strides in improving his schoolwork and his outlook on life--as can be attested by the submitted progress reports issued by the high school he is currently attending.
On the day of the second incident, my son went to an arcade in Bayside with a couple of friends and later proceeded to a nearby restaurant to grab a bite. But he quickly left the premises after being told that the plaintiff was also inside the same restaurant. Once outside, he called me to pick him up since he did not want to violate the restraining order against him. Unfortunately my son's limited understanding of the law misled him to believe he was in compliance so long as there was a spatial separation between himself and the plaintiff. Furthermore, he was unware at the time that the situation was worsened by his friends' summonning other friends on the phone while he was waiting outside. My son now understands better that restraining order means staying away at all times and in all situations (even happenstances), and he has assured me that he won't go back to his old neighborhood.
Your Honor, please understand that I would not be writing this letter in behalf of my son had I not seen visible improvement in my son while he was on parole. The changes in my son's attitude and schoolwork in the past few months have been genuine, and as mother I could not be any happier, were it not for this mishap.
As a side note, Dennis was unable to visit his dad, whom he gets to see only two months out of the year, in Georgia this past summer. It pained me to see him spend the summer in the detention center, knowing how much Dennis loves being with his Dad.
Honorable Judge! Dennis was well on his way to becoming a law-abiding, productive citizen in a new environment, and I give you my word that I will continue to nurture and guide him in the right direction.
Yours truly,
Top answer
Empassisoned and very convincing. Good luck.
- Empassisoned and very convincing.
- Good luck.
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4 Answers
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Is my writing grammatically correct? I don't want to go before the judge with a poorly written letter. Is there anything stylistically that you would change? Thanks.
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Good, convincing letter. Minor spelling errors and some enhancements. I have included the whole text here, as I am using a simple text editor (cannot highlight or format the error):
Honorable Judge ***,
I am the mother of Dennis (give full name). I would like to express my deep regret concerning the latest incident, which came as a shock to me since Dennis has been making great
Honorable Judge ***,
I am the mother of Dennis (give full name). I would like to express my deep regret concerning the latest incident, which came as a shock to me since Dennis has been making great
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