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Anonymous Posted 16 years ago
Letter Writing
I need help on a deferral letter to UCL
Hi,
I was wondering if anyone could help me. I am not very good at writing formal letters and this one is of particular importance as it a deferral letter which I need to send to the admissions office asking them to keep my place for entry next year instead of this year. This is what I have written:
"Dear Admissions Office,
I have recently been confirmed an offer of admission to University College London for entry in September 2010.
Unfortunately, due to a sudden change in circumstances I am writing to request a deferral of my admission for entry in September 2010 to September 2011. The reason I wish to defer my entry is due to my family facing some recent financial hardship since my mother has been made redundant from her full-time employment.
In this time, I am planning to extend my hours of my part-time employment, find other part-time work, to supplement my financial situation, and apply for work experience placements to help improve my skills in the Art History field.
Thank you very much for your consideration.
Yours sincerely,
(My Name) "
Does anyone think this is good enough? I really want them to keep my place. Any help would be greatly appreciated. Thank you
I was wondering if anyone could help me. I am not very good at writing formal letters and this one is of particular importance as it a deferral letter which I need to send to the admissions office asking them to keep my place for entry next year instead of this year. This is what I have written:
"Dear Admissions Office,
I have recently been confirmed an offer of admission to University College London for entry in September 2010.
Unfortunately, due to a sudden change in circumstances I am writing to request a deferral of my admission for entry in September 2010 to September 2011. The reason I wish to defer my entry is due to my family facing some recent financial hardship since my mother has been made redundant from her full-time employment.
In this time, I am planning to extend my hours of my part-time employment, find other part-time work, to supplement my financial situation, and apply for work experience placements to help improve my skills in the Art History field.
Thank you very much for your consideration.
Yours sincerely,
(My Name) "
Does anyone think this is good enough? I really want them to keep my place. Any help would be greatly appreciated. Thank you
Top answer
The first paragraph is a little unclear - were you offered admission, or did you confirm that you'd accepted the offer? The phrase "I've been confirmed an offer of admission" doesn't make correct use of the word "confirmed". " Also, there are some tweaks below: During this time, I am planning to extend my hours at my part-time employment, find other part-time work to supplement my financial situation, and apply for work experience placements to help improve my skills in the field of Art History.
- The first paragraph is a little unclear - were you offered admission, or did you confirm that you'd accepted the offer?
- The phrase "I've been confirmed an offer of admission" doesn't make correct use of the word "confirmed".
- " Also, there are some tweaks below: During this time, I am planning to extend my hours at my part-time employment, find other part-time work to supplement my financial situation, and apply for work experience placements to help improve my skills in the field of Art History.
- Overall, I think this should have the effect you want.
- ~Aaron
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2 Answers
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The first paragraph is a little unclear - were you offered admission, or did you confirm that you'd accepted the offer? The phrase "I've been confirmed an offer of admission" doesn't make correct use of the word "confirmed". "Confirm" means to say "Yes, that is correct" or "Yes, I will."
Also, there are some tweaks below:
During this time, I am planning to e
Also, there are some tweaks below:
During this time, I am planning to e
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It's a good letter - short and to the point.
Instead of writing the sentence on part-time employment, I would simply say "I have specific plans which will put me on solid financial footing next year, and also will be doing extra reading and studies in my major field."
Have you asked them about their policies on extending the offer of admission, and what steps you should take t
Instead of writing the sentence on part-time employment, I would simply say "I have specific plans which will put me on solid financial footing next year, and also will be doing extra reading and studies in my major field."
Have you asked them about their policies on extending the offer of admission, and what steps you should take t
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