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Bigbang8 Posted 17 years ago
Letter Writing

I am writing a formal letter and i need some help

my teacher asked me to write a formal letter by those orders:
you are planning to study abroad in a very prestigious college.
write a letter to the director of the college asking for the curriculum of the college.


here is what I wrote:


36 xxxx Street


Haifa, Israel


December 28th, 2008

The Dean

Wall Street College

Manhatten, New York



Dear Sir/Madam

I would like to apply for admission to your prestigious college.

I am an eighteen years old boy.

I have recently graduated from Shifman high school where I majored in geography.

Since I graduated high school I planned to study abroad so I thought about your college that my friend told me about.

I am particularly interested in computer programming which I excelled very much at my school.Moreover I understand you have an excellent course in computer programming.

I am fluent in English and therefore I should have no problem coping with studies in English.

I would be grateful if you if you could send me more information about the curriculum of the college.

Send me an application form of your college if you can.

Thank you for your assistance.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Yours faithfully,

Benny

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I need to know if its good enough
what I need to fix????

thanks,
  

Top answer

Hi, Welcome to the Forum. my teacher asked me to write a formal letter by those orders: you are planning to study abroad in a very prestigious college. write a letter to the director of the college asking for the curriculum of the college.

  • Hi, Welcome to the Forum.
  • my teacher asked me to write a formal letter by those orders: you are planning to study abroad in a very prestigious college.
  • write a letter to the director of the college asking for the curriculum of the college.
  • You have done much more than simply ask for a curriculum.
  • Your teacher did not ask you to apply.
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2 Answers
0
Hi,
Welcome to the Forum.

my teacher asked me to write a formal letter by those orders:
you are planning to study abroad in a very prestigious college.
write a letter to the director of the college asking for the curriculum of the college.

You have done much more than simply ask for a curriculum. Your teacher did not ask you to apply.

I would si
0
thank you very much

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