How to write motivation letter?

Hi everybody,

could you please give me some hints how to develop/correct my motivation letter?

Thank you
Cheers

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X University
July 19, 2012

Dear Sir or Madam:
I would like to apply to your full time MBA program starting in September 20XX. My career ambition is to become a manager.

After graduating B. Sc. in Computer Science in Italy, I was selected to attend to a double degree program. Therefore, I spent two years studying in Barcelona at Universitat Politecnica de Catalunya. Then, to graduate M. Sc. in Information Technologies, I spent 8 months in Shanghai to write an experimental thesis.
After my graduating, I wanted to enrich my international background and decided to start working in Germany. I got hired by an IT consultancy specialized in the telco business. I am used to work in an international environment with English as business language.
After more than 3 years working in Germany, now it is the right moment to start a new path that – I am convinced – will help to further develop my career.

I applied for the full time MBA because it is the natural completion of my personal and professional profile. The technical background acquired through the university and the work experience together with the international experience accumulated in the last 6 years spent abroad harmonize with the management education and know-how provided by your MBA.
I want to attend this MBA because X university is a recognized outstanding institution that can help me building the set of tools and techniques necessary to develop a managerial profile. After reading about your MBA program, I visited the faculty and got to know the alumni and the professors and I am confident of my decision.

Thank you for considering my application, and I look forward to your acceptance.

Best Regards,