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Osee Posted 18 years ago
Vocabulary

How to make the following sentence read more nice?

Secondly, the Department offers a stimulating and challenging academic environment (am I using a right word here?) – a large number of distinguished professors and excellent graduates, comprehensive course curricula, active research seminars and colloquia, together with many distinguished honours and awards achieved by the members.

Especially, I would like to know whether those redened adjectives are appropriate. In addition, I notice the word of "distinguished" gets used twice, could you help me find an alternative for one of them to make this sentence reads diversely.
  

Top answer

) – a large number of distinguished professors and excellent graduates, comprehensive course curricula, active research seminars and colloquia, together with many distinguished honours and awards achieved by the members. Especially, I would like to know whether those redened adjectives are appropriate. In addition, I notice the word of "distinguished" gets used twice, could you help me find an alternative for one of them to make this sentence reads diversely.

— Philip

  • ) – a large number of distinguished professors and excellent graduates, comprehensive course curricula, active research seminars and colloquia, together with many distinguished honours and awards achieved by the members.
  • Especially, I would like to know whether those redened adjectives are appropriate.
  • In addition, I notice the word of "distinguished" gets used twice, could you help me find an alternative for one of them to make this sentence reads diversely.
  • The second 'distinguished' could be replaced by 'prestigious'.
  • I find the other words effective.
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4 Answers
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OseeSecondly, the Department offers a stimulating and challenging academic environment (am I using a right word here?) – a large number of distinguished professors and excellent graduates, comprehensive course curricula,
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It's far too thick-- the reader will need a machete to clear the way. Try something like this:

The Department also offers a stimulating environment – comprehensive curricula, active seminars and colloquia, and distinguished professors and graduates who have achieved many honours and awards.
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Mister MicawberIt's far too thick-- the reader will need a machete to clear the way. Try something like this:
The Department also offers a stimulating environment – comprehensive curricula, active seminars and colloquia, and distinguished professors and graduates who have achieved many honours and awards.



I've never heard that
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Yes, your version is much better. And, as Philip mentioned, I like your comment itself. It even makes me think how fun the language is.
Mister MicawberIt's far too thick-- the reader will need a machete to clear the way. Try something like this:
The Department also offers a stimulating environment – comprehensive
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