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116687 Posted 18 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing
How to combine these two parts?
These two parts are at start of my essay~ how to combine them
"Since birth I was given a curious character. I found great pleasure in study from the first day of school when I was only 6 years old. The wheel of time passed my childhood to adolescence; I always had a question in my mind: what is success? Time has come that I have already studied for a year in university. Past years of study and life have formed the answer for me: success is not all about grades or number of awards. It is about doing what you love and doing it well.
"Life is like a movie", to be successful "movie star", one should play various roles successfully in one's own life. To be actor like that, I do my best in every role in my life."
And in the following parts I wanna to talk about my roles in life, so how to do with these two parts?
"Since birth I was given a curious character. I found great pleasure in study from the first day of school when I was only 6 years old. The wheel of time passed my childhood to adolescence; I always had a question in my mind: what is success? Time has come that I have already studied for a year in university. Past years of study and life have formed the answer for me: success is not all about grades or number of awards. It is about doing what you love and doing it well.
"Life is like a movie", to be successful "movie star", one should play various roles successfully in one's own life. To be actor like that, I do my best in every role in my life."
And in the following parts I wanna to talk about my roles in life, so how to do with these two parts?
Top answer
Your first paragraph is very disjointed -- just random thoughts thrown together. Saying you had a curious character since birth without explanation, and then jumping to when you were 6 is illogical. Then you talk about the wheel of time, so you're already 19 or so.
- Your first paragraph is very disjointed -- just random thoughts thrown together.
- Saying you had a curious character since birth without explanation, and then jumping to when you were 6 is illogical.
- Then you talk about the wheel of time, so you're already 19 or so.
- Then you talk about success.
- " Are you writing about how important it is to experience the many facets of life?
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3 Answers
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Your first paragraph is very disjointed -- just random thoughts thrown together. Saying you had a curious character since birth without explanation, and then jumping to when you were 6 is illogical. Then you talk about the wheel of time, so you're already 19 or so. Then you talk about success.
Are you writing about "What is success?"
Are you writing about how important it is to
Are you writing about "What is success?"
Are you writing about how important it is to
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thanks for your response!!!
yes, i wanna write about how important it it to experience the many facets of life.
so i just cannot find a appropriate paragraphy to intro this theme~
yes, i wanna write about how important it it to experience the many facets of life.
so i just cannot find a appropriate paragraphy to intro this theme~
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Start by listing the many roles you think you have played so far, and what roles you aspire to in the future.
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