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Rahul Shah Posted 11 years ago
Grammar
How can the below sentences be improved?
Can someone please suggest on how to improve the below sentences:
1. On my visits to John, I observed that the skin near his genital area is inflamed, red, blistered and has started peeling. I conclude that it is nappy rash and must have been caused because his skin is exposed to wet or dirty nappies for too long.
2. I have noticed that he is losing weight and looks pale and weak. I have noticed that he appears hungry and eats very quickly whenever he is offered food that I bring along with me. This leads me to believe that he is not adequately fed and misses home cooked food.
Thanks in advance.
1. On my visits to John, I observed that the skin near his genital area is inflamed, red, blistered and has started peeling. I conclude that it is nappy rash and must have been caused because his skin is exposed to wet or dirty nappies for too long.
2. I have noticed that he is losing weight and looks pale and weak. I have noticed that he appears hungry and eats very quickly whenever he is offered food that I bring along with me. This leads me to believe that he is not adequately fed and misses home cooked food.
Thanks in advance.
Top answer
1. On my visits to John, I observed that the skin near his genitals is inflamed. I conclude that it is diaper rash.
- 1.
- On my visits to John, I observed that the skin near his genitals is inflamed.
- I conclude that it is diaper rash.
- 2.
- He appears hungry and eats very quickly whenever I offer him food.
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1 Answers
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1. On my visits to John, I observed that the skin near his genitals is inflamed. I conclude that it is diaper rash.
2. I have noticed that he is losing weight and looks pale and weak.He appears hungry and eats very quickly whenever I offer him food. This leads me to believe that he is not adequately fed.
2. I have noticed that he is losing weight and looks pale and weak.He appears hungry and eats very quickly whenever I offer him food. This leads me to believe that he is not adequately fed.
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