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A little sip could take you from your depressing mood to ecstasy. Alcohol, the medicine for pain, suffering, and tears was something my cousins and I relied on to help us take a step away from the demanding world. Or that was what I thought a few years ago before I witnessed my cousin sit with a bottle in his hand, passed out on a warm June night.
"How much can you chug? Don't be a p*ssy" they would say in a house filled with adolescents. Drinking is the norm among teenagers, and like the rest, my cousins and I gave in to the temptation. The start of my drinking days was not special or fun, actually it was nothing like what you saw on television. The truth is I started drinking to pass the time and to connect with my cousins, never understanding the consequences. In a way, alcohol was a substitute for water, and since it was not a drug, it was in simpler terms, acceptable.

The truth only hurts when she comes and slaps you across your face. The shock and horror of my older cousin's death will forever remind me of the consequences of the poison liquid. A sip of tequila or Smirnoff does not guarantee safety but like other foolish children we did not realize the truth until we felt the pain on our cheeks. On a warm summer night, my older cousin made a surprise visit, carrying a suitcase of problems. It turned out he discovered his girlfriend was cheating on him and to top it off, he was laid off work. Instead of comforting him, my cousins teased him relentlessly. "Don't worry, everything will be fine, don't whine, life will work itself out". But life is not so easy; a problem is viewed as a tapeworm. The more you feed it the worse your pains are, but to solve the problem you have to relax for a moment and work things out with a clear mind, eventually eliminating the problem. Thinking with a clear mind is simpler said then done, the combination of alcohol and tears could break down the strongest will. Whether it was to ease his pain or escape reality, his glass filled with the scorching substance.
The flow of the fiery liquid down your scorching throat has the power to escape sanity. Bottle in hand, my cousin began to dig his grave, briskly chugging down the alcohol. If I could have changed what happened, I would, but my cousin began to drink the hazy mixture of Red Bull and Smirnoff without pause. He seemed to be drinking as if it was his last day. Shot after shot, bottle after bottle the night crept by. I remember vividly of the red haze of the house that night, perhaps due to the fire lamps, or a sign from God about danger. With the eerie setting, my cousin took a small shaking step and collapsed like a stack of cards. After a few minutes of blacking in and out caused him to severely cry. His cry was not normal, at first I thought it was grieving, but realized he was losing his mind. The pain on his face was obvious; he had given up on life. The seriousness had struck us, and we swiftly put his body in the car and rushed him to the hospital to have his stomach pumped. Arriving at the hospital felt like a dream, I thought only of the health of my cousin, and not the least bit about consequences.
The world is a cruel and sickening place, and at times, only death could lighten someone's perspectives. With the horror around me, I arose weakened and disheartened. The stillness of his cold body would haunt me for years. The slight trace of warmth in his hand embraced by his weeping mother caused frustration to let go and tears to flow. I had no right to be there standing in front of him, alive. I ran out the ER and into the parking lot, slowly creeping to a bench surrounded by a tree. Heaving heavily, I arrived with my emotions pouring from my eyes. I crept up in a ball, I had had enough.
What happened the next day, or the next, I do not remember, or do I want to. I still believe that the world is an unforgiving place. It is hard for me to say that the consequences of drinking led to those events, even though I probably know it's true. Whether it is denial or not, I changed my opinions about alcohol. I can not stand to see my family or friends drink. Although death and pain is part of life, if I continue to do my best in doing what I believe, maybe I can create change. Every person has a purpose in life, and I had found mines.