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Jenn123 Posted 10 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Hi there, could someone please proofread the below

Short description
A cop with a connection to the criminal underworld finds his secret life exposed when he steals cocaine from a powerful drug dealer, a move that puts his son's life in jeopardy.

Long description
Narcotics cops Diwakar and his assistant Mani rob two drug peddlers of 10kgs of cocaine who work for the drug dealer Vittal Rao. To gain back his package, Vittal Rao kidnaps Diwakar's son and demands the return of the cocaine load. As Divakar decides to succumb to the demand, he finds the consignment missing. Will he manage to save his son from Vittal Rao?
  

Top answer

Narcotics cops Diwakar and his assistant Mani rob two drug peddlers of 10kgs of cocaine who work for the drug dealer Vittal Rao (Does the cocaine work for the drug dealer? ). To gain back his package, Vittal Rao kidnaps Diwakar's son and demands the return of the cocaine.

  • Narcotics cops Diwakar and his assistant Mani rob two drug peddlers of 10kgs of cocaine who work for the drug dealer Vittal Rao (Does the cocaine work for the drug dealer?
  • ).
  • To gain back his package, Vittal Rao kidnaps Diwakar's son and demands the return of the cocaine.
  • As Divakar decides to give in to the demand, he finds the consignment missing.
  • Will he manage to save his son from Vittal Rao?
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5 Answers
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Narcotics cops Diwakar and his assistant Mani rob two drug peddlers of 10kgs of cocaine who work for the drug dealer Vittal Rao (Does the cocaine work for the drug dealer? That's what you said.). To gain back his package, Vittal Rao kidnaps Diwakar's son and demands the return of the cocaine. As Divakar decides to give in to the demand, he finds the consignment
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EnglishmavenNarcotics cops Diwakar and his assistant Mani rob two drug peddlers of 10kgs of cocaine who work for the drug dealer Vittal Rao (Does the cocaine work for the drug dealer? That's what you said.).
Thank you for your kind feedback, Englishmaven. Yes, your point is very clear to me. I hace rewriiten the summary, please take a look.

Narcotics
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Jenn123Narcotics cops Diwakar and his assistant Mani steal away a big consignment of drug king Vittal Rao.To gain back his package, Vittal Rao kidnaps Diwakar's son and demands the return of the cocaine. As Divakar decides to give in to the demand, he finds the consignment missing. Will he manage to save his son from Vittal Rao?
This is awkward. It would be be
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I modified the writing after your comments, looking forward to receiving feedback, thanks.
Narcotics cops Diwakar and Mani steal a big consignment of drug from the dealer Vittal Rao.To get it back, Vittal Rao kidnaps Diwakar's son and demands the return of the cocaine. As Divakar decides to give in to the demand, he finds that the consignment is missing. Will he manage to save his son from Vit
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That is much better. It just needs one, slight correction.
Jenn123Narcotics cops Diwakar and Mani steal a big consignment of drug from the dealer Vittal Rao.
Narcotics cops Diwakar and Mani steal a big consignment of drugs from the dealer Vittal Rao.

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