Hi, I've just written an essay about study abroad, I would really appreaciate that if you point out my mistakes. Thank you a lot

Topic: More and more students are choosing to study at colleges and universities in a foreign country. Do the benefits of studying abroad outweigh the drawbacks?

Going study abroad these days has emerged like a tendency that all students have a huge desire for doing so. Although such development has both up and downsides, I strongly believe that the advantages of it totally outweigh its drawbacks.

Studying abroad shows some disadvantages to learners. First of all, it could lead to some serious mental health problems. That is to say, going to such a foreign country without any acquaintance could be extremely challenging, especially for socialization. Once the student can not cope with this obstacle, it is obvious that they might feel a sense of loneliness affecting them both physically and mentally. Second, the majority of them have to suffer from culture shock. Coming to an entirely new land for the first time after being so accustomed to their own culture, students could find out that really difficult to accept a totally new set of etiquettes and beliefs. Therefore, studying in foreign countries could bring about some disadvantages to people.

Nevertheless, learning far from home does benefit learners in numerous ways. To begin with, it helps students widen their range of knowledge. In terms of academics, the provided programs could be much more brilliant than those in students’ nations, which would turn them into profound graduates. Furthermore, when it comes to the culture, it inheres a significant number of strange things evoking the desire to obtain these of students. Second, learning from a far distance from home could make people become independent. They have to learn to live on their own and deal with housing problems or bills, not to mention that they also have to make money for their living.

To conclude, despite the fact that studying abroad has some drawbacks, I still strongly believe that its advantages totally outweigh.