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Anonymous Posted 10 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Hi can you help me correct this one .

Modern technology, such as fertilizer, pesticide and modern machinery can feed the better. However, it is negative to human health.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

With the rapid development of science, a host of agriculture technologies, such as fertilizers and pesticides, have been applied to enhance the output of crops. But meanwhile, increasing people have showed great concerns about the negative effects aroused by modern technology.

Firstly, the utilization of fertilizers causes the changes in the structure of soil. In the long term, these changes render the soil infertile, which means we could not reuse the land after a good harvest with the help of fertilizers. This leaves a severe problem regarding starvation and destitution for people who live on this barren land.

Secondly, various pesticides are applied to kill most insects that are harmful for crops. But at the same time, they also kill the insects which are beneficial for human beings. Furthermore, as pesticides are abused, it is possible for people to take in vegetables or fruits with pesticide sediment, which puts people’s health in risks and gives rise to suffering in digestive and neural systems.

Thirdly, modern machinery saves people a great deal of time and energy. But natural resources it consumes cannot be ignored, which brings about serious environmental contamination such as oil spill, dirty dust and haze. The subsequent problems associated with pollution obviously exert adverse influence on physical health such as respiratory problems, bad sleep quality, heart diseases.

To sum up, the employment of modern technology plays a resilient role in daily life. People ought to raise the awareness of negative effects coming along with the innovations and turn their applications to a good account.
  

Top answer

The essay question sounds very unnatural to me. Where did you find it? Also, the third body paragraph doesn't work for me; it's not convincing.

  • The essay question sounds very unnatural to me.
  • Where did you find it?
  • Also, the third body paragraph doesn't work for me; it's not convincing.
  • ------------------------------------------------------------ With the rapid development of science, a host of agricultural technologies, such as the use of fertilizers and pesticides, have been applied to increase crop production.
  • Nevertheless, many people have concerns about the potential negative effects caused by such modern agricultural practices, and especially about the effect of chemicals on human health and the environment.
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1 Answers
0
The essay question sounds very unnatural to me. Where did you find it?
Also, the third body paragraph doesn't work for me; it's not convincing.

------------------------------------------------------------

With the rapid development of science, a host of agricultural technologies, such as the use of fertilizers and pesticides, have been applied to increase crop production. Nev

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