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Anonymous Posted 18 years ago
Letter Writing
hey can you please review my letter of motivation
0 Dear Madam or Sir, 02 br
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00 I am a 4th year Chinese Language and Culture Student at 00 . I would like to apply to your graduate program in Contemporary Chinese Studies. 02 br
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00 Originally I started my studies in my hometown 00 , where I visited the Chinese Studies department for 3 semesters. The focus of study there was on Chinese and Asian politics, however I realised that for a more thorough understanding I needed to be in command of Chinese language, being able to read and refer to first hand documents, rather than translations. After my first exchange year in 01 02 00 I immediately fell in love with the country and its people, so I decided to stay and continue improving my Chinese. 02 br
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00 During my time in 00 I attended classes in various fields, such like Chinese economics, Government, History as well as classical Chinese Language and 00 . 00 Overall the courses where very comprehensive and now, after almost 3 years of study, I am able to read most Chinese books and newspapers. I also was a member in the University’s Model United Nations student association. In Model UN, students take on roles as foreign diplomats and participate in a simulated session of an intergovernmental organization. 02 br
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00 Now that 01 02 00 is playing a more and more important role in international politics, and I hope that through your program I can get a more accurate vision of the facts that underlie the relations between 01 02 00 and the rest of the world. 00 I’m keenly interested in acquiring more theoretical knowledge and especially more academic skills in this area. 00 My father works for the German government and worked in central Asian countries like 01 02 00 and 01 02 00 for many years. I was taught at an early age to develop an interest in political and economical matters and this has developed into a real passion. Therefore, I’m seriously considering working in the government sector or in foreign relations. 01 span 00 I think your program would be the right complement to my language degree (Any suggestions to make it sound better?) 02 span 00 . Moreover 00 has an outstanding reputation in social sciences and an international orientation. 02 br
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00 The international experience I gathered during my time in 01 02 00 made me very adaptable and able to communicate with people from various cultural backgrounds. Besides my mother language German I speak fluent English, Chinese and basic French, Spanish. I am a very diligent person, 01 font 00 BLABLABLABLA (any suggestions?) 02 font 02 br
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00 I thank you for considering my application. 02 br
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00 Yours sincerely, 0-
02 br
00 I am a 4th year Chinese Language and Culture Student at 00 . I would like to apply to your graduate program in Contemporary Chinese Studies. 02 br
02 br
00 Originally I started my studies in my hometown 00 , where I visited the Chinese Studies department for 3 semesters. The focus of study there was on Chinese and Asian politics, however I realised that for a more thorough understanding I needed to be in command of Chinese language, being able to read and refer to first hand documents, rather than translations. After my first exchange year in 01 02 00 I immediately fell in love with the country and its people, so I decided to stay and continue improving my Chinese. 02 br
02 br
00 During my time in 00 I attended classes in various fields, such like Chinese economics, Government, History as well as classical Chinese Language and 00 . 00 Overall the courses where very comprehensive and now, after almost 3 years of study, I am able to read most Chinese books and newspapers. I also was a member in the University’s Model United Nations student association. In Model UN, students take on roles as foreign diplomats and participate in a simulated session of an intergovernmental organization. 02 br
02 br
00 Now that 01 02 00 is playing a more and more important role in international politics, and I hope that through your program I can get a more accurate vision of the facts that underlie the relations between 01 02 00 and the rest of the world. 00 I’m keenly interested in acquiring more theoretical knowledge and especially more academic skills in this area. 00 My father works for the German government and worked in central Asian countries like 01 02 00 and 01 02 00 for many years. I was taught at an early age to develop an interest in political and economical matters and this has developed into a real passion. Therefore, I’m seriously considering working in the government sector or in foreign relations. 01 span 00 I think your program would be the right complement to my language degree (Any suggestions to make it sound better?) 02 span 00 . Moreover 00 has an outstanding reputation in social sciences and an international orientation. 02 br
02 br
02 br
02 br
00 The international experience I gathered during my time in 01 02 00 made me very adaptable and able to communicate with people from various cultural backgrounds. Besides my mother language German I speak fluent English, Chinese and basic French, Spanish. I am a very diligent person, 01 font 00 BLABLABLABLA (any suggestions?) 02 font 02 br
02 br
02 br
02 br
02 br
02 br
00 I thank you for considering my application. 02 br
02 br
02 br
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00 Yours sincerely, 0-
Top answer
2 br 02 br 00 Hi Anon, 02 br 02 br 02 br 02 br 00 I kind of waited to see if your letter had enough appeal to draw some interest before I give my two cents. I think in general, your letter is easily understood. 00 00 I didn’t want to go through the whole letter but I did mark up your first paragraph as a reference to hopefully 00 00 give you a contrast and improve the fluency and tone of the letter.
- 2 br 02 br 00 Hi Anon, 02 br 02 br 02 br 02 br 00 I kind of waited to see if your letter had enough appeal to draw some interest before I give my two cents.
- I think in general, your letter is easily understood.
- 00 00 I didn’t want to go through the whole letter but I did mark up your first paragraph as a reference to hopefully 00 00 give you a contrast and improve the fluency and tone of the letter.
- 00 00 02 br 02 br 00 Dear Sir /Madam, 02 br 02 br 00 I am a 4th year Chinese Language and Culture 00 S 00 tudent at 00 .
- 02 br 02 br 00 Originally 00 , 00 I started my studies in my hometown Heidelberg, where I ( 00 had studied at ) 00 01 u 00 visited 02 u 00 the Chinese Studies department for 3 semesters 00 , 00 00 focusing on 00 00 The focus of study there was on 00 Chinese and Asian politics 00 , 00 00 H 00 owever I realised that 00 in order to gain a better 00 00 or a more thorough 00 understanding, I needed to have a good 01 u 00 be in 02 u 00 command of ( 00 the) 00 Chinese language, as well as being able to read and comprehend documents, 01 u 00 refer to 02 u 00 first hand rather than translations.
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1 Answers
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2 br
02 br
00 Hi Anon, 02 br
02 br
02 br
02 br
00 I kind of waited to see if your letter had enough appeal to draw some interest before I give my two cents. I think in general, your letter is easily understood. However, I find it a bit wordy and the tone was rather stiff. 00 00 I didn’t want to go through the whole letter but I did mark up your fi
02 br
00 Hi Anon, 02 br
02 br
02 br
02 br
00 I kind of waited to see if your letter had enough appeal to draw some interest before I give my two cents. I think in general, your letter is easily understood. However, I find it a bit wordy and the tone was rather stiff. 00 00 I didn’t want to go through the whole letter but I did mark up your fi
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