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Dni483 Posted 11 years ago
Grammar

Help please

Hi can anyone check this and I would be grateful if anyone could help me improve it to sound more formal.
The person I am writing to is a event photographer whom I have spoken to before and he gave me his business card to get back to him.

I am writing to follow up on our discussion we had at Olympia nearly 2 months ago. I asked you a few questions about your experience as an event photographer and whether you work for an agency. If you wonder how I got your email, you gave me your business card to get back to you.


I'm currently studying photography degree in the University of Greenwich and I just wanted to ask how I can get into the event photography agency that you work for since I want to build up on my photography experience.
  

Top answer

Dni483 The person I am writing to is a event photographer The person I am writing to is an event photographer Dni483 If you wonder how I got your email , If you wonder how I got your email address , Dni483 I'm currently studying photography degree in the University of Greenwich I'm currently studying for a photography degree at the University of Greenwich Dni483 I want to build up on my photography experience. I want to build up my photography experience.

  • Dni483 The person I am writing to is a event photographer The person I am writing to is an event photographer Dni483 If you wonder how I got your email , If you wonder how I got your email address , Dni483 I'm currently studying photography degree in the University of Greenwich I'm currently studying for a photography degree at the University of Greenwich Dni483 I want to build up on my photography experience.
  • I want to build up my photography experience.
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2 Answers
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Dni483The person I am writing to is a event photographer
The person I am writing to is an event photographer
Dni483If you wonder how I got your email,
If you wonder how I got your email address,
Dni483I'm
0
I am writing to follow up on our discussion at Olympia nearly two months ago. I asked you a few questions about your experience as an event photographer and whether you work for an agency. If you are wondering how I got your email address, you gave me your business card so I could get back to you.

I'm currently studying photography at the University of Greenwich. I just wanted to ask how

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