My son will be applying primary school soon and we would like to request his headmistress to prepare a reference letter. However she already communicated to all parents that she will not write for every student. Hence I need to have an impressive letter to pursue her to consider helping us.
Appreciate if any one can give me some comments on the letter.

Thanks!
It will only be months away that our son, XXX, will embark into a new journey of his school life and we would very much appreciated if you can provide a reference letter for his primary school application.
Under the dedication, support and caring of your school, he attained good grades in all subjects and received the “2007/2008 outstanding student award”. He is also an Advanced Honor student in “Kumon” Mathematics and English subjects.
In addition to academic achievement, he has participated in different extra-curricular activities and he won awards as recognition of his talents. He was the Champion of “xxx speech contest” and second runner up in “YYY speech contest”. He also achieved a “Distinction” in Trinity College Drama and Speech Graded examination (score 94/100).
We believe that your positive recommendations can help him a long way in applying for a good school that can further accelerate his potentials and continue to nurture the values of righteous, love and truth.
Enclosed please kindly find his portfolio for your consideration. If any further information is required, we are delight to discuss at any point of time.
Thank you very much for your attention.