0
Invalidid87 Posted 17 years ago
Grammar

Help me write better

Can someone help me make this article look better. I know that it is filled with grammatical errors. I am not a native english writer and I need to improve my english. Tips & suggestions to make this article better are welcome.

"Last month, my cousin Jason, broke his foot when he was playing soccer in his school. He immediately underwent computer navigation surgery and recovered from the injury within two months.He was playing in a charity match where he broke his right foot when he slid for a tackle. His foot tangled with the opposite team player and it snapped during the tackle. The opposite number also suffered from a broken arm. Thank God, the medics were there to help him. The medics rushed the injured players to "Peninsula Orthopedic Associates" {POA} where they were treated by Dr. Michael Reyes who is a renowned Orthopedic surgery specialist in San Francisco. Both the players underwent computer navigation surgeries under his supervision and the players were discharged from the hospital within two days. It took three weeks for my cousin to walk properly. He is looking forward to get back to the training fields once again. Doctors have estimated that it will take nearly two months for him to completely recover from the injury and get back to playing soccer."

Thanks in advance for the people who are about to help me write english better.
  

Top answer

I have underlined some problem areas: Last month, my cousin Jason, broke his foot when he was playing soccer in his school. He immediately underwent computer navigation surgery and recovered from the injury within two months. He was playing in a charity match where he broke his right foot when he slid for a tackle.

  • I have underlined some problem areas: Last month, my cousin Jason, broke his foot when he was playing soccer in his school.
  • He immediately underwent computer navigation surgery and recovered from the injury within two months.
  • He was playing in a charity match where he broke his right foot when he slid for a tackle.
  • His foot tangled with the opposite team player and it snapped during the tackle .
  • The opposite number also suffered from a broken arm.
Free · every Monday

Get the Weekly English Kit 📬

New words, one handy idiom, and a 2-minute quiz — delivered to your inbox to keep your streak alive.

1 Answers
0
I have underlined some problem areas:

Last month, my cousin Jason, broke his foot when he was playing soccer in his school. He immediately underwent computer navigation surgery and recovered from the injury within two months. He was playing in a charity match where he broke his right foot when he slid for a tackle. His foot tangled with t

Related Questions