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Tiểu Cầm Posted 10 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Help me to correct this writing

When choosing a job, the salary is the most important consideration.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people argue that we should consider salary as the first priority when choosing a job. In my opinion, while I agree that the wage is necessary, I also believe that other factors are equally important.
Most people need salary as a major source to sustainably maintain their own life balance. Money from a secure job has gradually been a mainly effective tool to improve life quality today. For example, workers with a low wage are likely to struggle to afford high qualified necessities or send their children to private school educational system. It is also clear that when the basic physiological requirements cannot be completely met, the level of job performance will be certainly deteriorated. Moreover, the modern society has expected to attach high salary to a person's success. As a result, high-wage people will have more opportunities to be put into contact with wealthier class so that they can handily develop their career path.
On the other hand, I believe that apart from salary, there are different vital elements we should consider seriously when taking up a job. Firstly, job seekers tend to find a institution or an organization whose environment is favorable and encouraging. An appropriate workplace will nurture the workers' essential skills and help them build strong relationships. Secondly, promotion is absolutely an indispensable factor because it gives personnel the sense of recognition and respect. How much a person dedicate to working based primarily on the rewarding perk they receive for what he/she has done.
In conclusion, I believe that both the salary and other elements plays an integral part when considering a job.
  

Top answer

Many people argue that we should consider salary as the first priority when choosing a job. In my opinion, while I agree that the wage (The plural wages is used as a synonym of an individual's salary. ) is necessary, I also believe that other factors are equally important.

  • Many people argue that we should consider salary as the first priority when choosing a job.
  • In my opinion, while I agree that the wage (The plural wages is used as a synonym of an individual's salary.
  • ) is necessary, I also believe that other factors are equally important.
  • Most people need (missing word) salary as a major source to sustainably maintain their own life balance .
  • ) been a mainly effective tool to improve life quality today.
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1 Answers
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Many people argue that we should consider salary as the first priority when choosing a job. In my opinion, while I agree that the wage (The plural wages is used as a synonym of an individual's salary. ) is necessary, I also believe that other factors are equally important.
Most people need (missing word) salary as a major sour

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