I don't know if you need to mention some of your hobbies, etc. But here are some very small corrections to your draft: I would like to apply for the Master’s Degree in Management of Information Systems. During the 5 years of my undergraduate education I studied electrical engineering with specialization in Computer engineering.
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Nona The BritYour letter's ok. Anon already helped you tidy up the few errors.Thanks NONA is there any need to mention some personal information and other deatils like hobbies, non professional facts ...etc