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Devon001 Posted 20 years ago
Argumentative Essay
Thesis: We should pay for recreational facilities through user fees.
Format:
P-: Describe the plight of a person experiencing a problem related to the issue. State your position clearly.
P2-: Summarize opposing view points
P3-: Refute opponents and present your views
P4-: Conclusion
Cher Mohammed lives in a small, shabby house in Houston, Texas. She’s a widow and a grandmother of the age of seventy-two, raising three kids all by herself. She can hardly work to keep the bills paid and to pay for her medicine. Now the citizens of Houston are preparing to vote whether funding for recreational park should come from raising tax or let users pay a fee to play. But raising taxes on poor Ms. Mohammed and other people like herself is not the solution. We should let users pay a fee to play.
Some citizens might argue that , children do not have jobs and so cannot pay to play, if they wanted to play they can earn there money by working around the community. Secondly, community would be safer if adolescent have a place to play. This might be true, but the recreational park can also attract gangs that can entice the children into doing drugs if they pay to play the guards or the vendor can turn them down and call the police. Thirdly, adults were once children who had things provided for them, if you provide your children with things in front of them they would be to lazy to work for what they want
In my view, I believe people would take better care of the facilities if they paid to play. Since, they are paying to play they would not be tempted to vandalize the park since it’s going to be that person paying for the park. Next, some individuals would not use the facilities and want to spend all of their money on themselves. It’s not fair for someone to be paying to keep the recreational facilities up and running when they don’t have time to use it. Lastly, Elderly have already raised their kids and wouldn’t use the facilities. They Worry about medical bills. It’s time for elderly people need to take care of themselves.
In conclusion, recreational facilities should be paid by users paying a fee to play it’s important for the well-being of the whole community. I have explained thoroughly why, we should not increase taxes for recreational park.
I'll be grateful, if you guys can point out any errors and tell me what you think abou tmy Argumentative Essay, and if you can give me pointers or hints to strenghten my essay.. Thank You..
Essay & Composition Writing
Help Desperately Needed: Profread and comments please
Argumentative Essay
Thesis: We should pay for recreational facilities through user fees.
Format:
P-: Describe the plight of a person experiencing a problem related to the issue. State your position clearly.
P2-: Summarize opposing view points
P3-: Refute opponents and present your views
P4-: Conclusion
Cher Mohammed lives in a small, shabby house in Houston, Texas. She’s a widow and a grandmother of the age of seventy-two, raising three kids all by herself. She can hardly work to keep the bills paid and to pay for her medicine. Now the citizens of Houston are preparing to vote whether funding for recreational park should come from raising tax or let users pay a fee to play. But raising taxes on poor Ms. Mohammed and other people like herself is not the solution. We should let users pay a fee to play.
Some citizens might argue that , children do not have jobs and so cannot pay to play, if they wanted to play they can earn there money by working around the community. Secondly, community would be safer if adolescent have a place to play. This might be true, but the recreational park can also attract gangs that can entice the children into doing drugs if they pay to play the guards or the vendor can turn them down and call the police. Thirdly, adults were once children who had things provided for them, if you provide your children with things in front of them they would be to lazy to work for what they want
In my view, I believe people would take better care of the facilities if they paid to play. Since, they are paying to play they would not be tempted to vandalize the park since it’s going to be that person paying for the park. Next, some individuals would not use the facilities and want to spend all of their money on themselves. It’s not fair for someone to be paying to keep the recreational facilities up and running when they don’t have time to use it. Lastly, Elderly have already raised their kids and wouldn’t use the facilities. They Worry about medical bills. It’s time for elderly people need to take care of themselves.
In conclusion, recreational facilities should be paid by users paying a fee to play it’s important for the well-being of the whole community. I have explained thoroughly why, we should not increase taxes for recreational park.
I'll be grateful, if you guys can point out any errors and tell me what you think abou tmy Argumentative Essay, and if you can give me pointers or hints to strenghten my essay.. Thank You..
Top answer
Hi, You need to work on para 2, which is asking you to summarise the opposing viewpoint. However, all you have come up with is: 'Some citizens might argue that , children do not have jobs and so cannot pay to play, if they wanted to play they can earn there money by working around the community. ' Then the rest of the paragraph: 'This might be true, but the recreational park can also attract gangs that can entice the children into doing drugs if they pay to play the guards or the vendor can turn them down and call the police.
- Hi, You need to work on para 2, which is asking you to summarise the opposing viewpoint.
- However, all you have come up with is: 'Some citizens might argue that , children do not have jobs and so cannot pay to play, if they wanted to play they can earn there money by working around the community.
- ' Then the rest of the paragraph: 'This might be true, but the recreational park can also attract gangs that can entice the children into doing drugs if they pay to play the guards or the vendor can turn them down and call the police.
- ' is actually just refuting those opinions, which is what you have been asked to do in paragraph 3.
- This is making your essay very unbalanced.
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2 Answers
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Hi,
You need to work on para 2, which is asking you to summarise the opposing viewpoint. However, all you have come up with is: 'Some citizens might argue that , children do not have jobs and so cannot pay to play, if they wanted to play they can earn there money by working around the community. Secondly, community would be safer if adolescent have a place to play.'
Then the rest
You need to work on para 2, which is asking you to summarise the opposing viewpoint. However, all you have come up with is: 'Some citizens might argue that , children do not have jobs and so cannot pay to play, if they wanted to play they can earn there money by working around the community. Secondly, community would be safer if adolescent have a place to play.'
Then the rest
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I was a bit confused by how it went from the poor old lady to people in the community voting of funding for a park by rising taxes. It is too much in the first paragraph. Take your time and let you point get across in a logical order.
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