Gre argument

I am new on english writings. Please point out grammar errors in this essay.

Thank you.

In this short critique, the author listed two researches conducted by
the same group of scientists in University of Leewille
concerning/regarding the reading habit of Leeville
citizens/residents/inhabitants. By comparing the result of these two
researches, the arguer draw to the conclusion that the first research
in which most respondents claim that they prefer classics is faulted/
questioned.

Though the conclusion made on the above article seems
plausible/credible, there are vital logical failures in the
argumentation. Thus, without further convincing reasoning or
statistics, I cannot confidently support the argument of the author.

First, even most respondents said that they preferred literary
classics does not necessarily implies they prefer literary classics
over mystery novel. We need to know the format of the first survey in
order to derive this strong conclusion. It is quite likely that the
first survey is conducted by letting the respondent fill a
multi-choice form, and there is no reasoning for mystery novel to be
in this form. It is possible that the researchers listed science
fiction and thought it contains mystery novel. While a large amount of
people who love mystery novel do not think science fiction in general
is their cup of tea, or at least in Leeville. It is also possible that
the researcher, for some academic reason, only want know how people
will choose between literary textbook and literary classics. If this
is the case, the first research obviously has nothing to do with the
second research.

Second, even the researcher is the same, this do not mean the
interested field of study is the same in both research. Maybe the
second research is conducted over high schools, while the first the
conducted among professors in universities. Then, the result of two
researches totally makes sense, and there is no contradictory at all
between the two results. Simply state the difference between to result
does not necessarily mean contradiction. It is also possible that the
prediction of the derivation from the first result is exactly the
reason why those researchers conduct the second. Also, a more
obviously logically failure lies that the two researches do not
parallel in time. One is the follow up of the other. While the reading
habit can change over time, as the first result is published, it is
possible that the citizen in Leeville realized that it's time for them
to change reading habit. In this case, the two researches clearly
demonstrate the drift of the reading habit among Leeville people.

Thirdly, the book frequently checked out from public libraries does
not well represent the reading habit of general people. It is common
sense that people tends to borrow novels from library while have buy
literary classics. Reading mystery novel can be a social recreation
activity in Leeville, while it is literary classics that may be the
book for those people to sit down and read quietly.

Thus, the argument is not well developed. To convince me, the author
may need to state the time slots when those two researches are
conducted, the ranges of people as respondents for each for those
researches, whether they represent the people of same condition in
both cases. And most importantly, shows what the people actually read
during their spare time, not just draw the conclusion from the record
in public libraries. The record in local bookstores, for example, may
be a good place to look at. Without those new evidences added, the
author is too hasty to draw the conclusion that the respondents in the
first result misrepresent their reading habits.