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Anonymous Posted 10 years ago
Letter Writing
Grammar rules for lists - list in a cover letter
Hello, could you advice on the following extract from a cover letter. I am struggling with the introductory phrase proceeding the bullet list and with the first bullet in the list. Could I use a full sentence in the first bullet only? I know that it is much more advisable to make all pullets parallel to one another, but I find it a bit strange putting a colon after "I" in the introductory phrase(see version 2).
Version 1:
"As an analyst in the XXXXXX Team at XXXX (name of company):
? I worked with complex grading and reporting systems, manipulating, and interpreting complex data sets
? Analysed and responded to deviations in the...
? Initiated resolving intrasystem data quality issues, improving ....
? Modelled proposed changes to methodology, evaluating the impact of those changes on ....
? Analysed risk models’ data inputs and sources, helping improve the performance of ...."
Version 2:
"As an analyst in the XXXXXX Team at XXXX (name of company), I:
? Worked with complex grading and reporting systems, manipulating, and interpreting complex data sets
? Analysed and responded to deviations in the...
? Initiated resolving intrasystem data quality issues, improving ....
? Modelled proposed changes to methodology, evaluating the impact of those changes on ....
? Analysed risk models’ data inputs and sources, helping improve the performance of ...."
Many thanks!
Version 1:
"As an analyst in the XXXXXX Team at XXXX (name of company):
? I worked with complex grading and reporting systems, manipulating, and interpreting complex data sets
? Analysed and responded to deviations in the...
? Initiated resolving intrasystem data quality issues, improving ....
? Modelled proposed changes to methodology, evaluating the impact of those changes on ....
? Analysed risk models’ data inputs and sources, helping improve the performance of ...."
Version 2:
"As an analyst in the XXXXXX Team at XXXX (name of company), I:
? Worked with complex grading and reporting systems, manipulating, and interpreting complex data sets
? Analysed and responded to deviations in the...
? Initiated resolving intrasystem data quality issues, improving ....
? Modelled proposed changes to methodology, evaluating the impact of those changes on ....
? Analysed risk models’ data inputs and sources, helping improve the performance of ...."
Many thanks!
Top answer
This is the type of detail that should be in your resume or CV, but not in your cover letter. , and highlight the main three or four reasons that the employer should read your resume and give you an interview. Clive
- This is the type of detail that should be in your resume or CV, but not in your cover letter.
- , and highlight the main three or four reasons that the employer should read your resume and give you an interview.
- Clive
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3 Answers
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This is the type of detail that should be in your resume or CV, but not in your cover letter.
Cover letters are normally written in formal prose,without bullet points or lists., and highlight the main three or four reasons that the employer should read your resume and give you an interview.
Clive
Cover letters are normally written in formal prose,without bullet points or lists., and highlight the main three or four reasons that the employer should read your resume and give you an interview.
Clive
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Thanks for the feedback. Yes, I now that this construction is far more appropriate for a CV, but this is a very special, very precise cover letter, and the 5 bullets target the 5 very specific experiences and skills that are mandatory for the position that I will apply for. In addition, these bullets elaborate on what is already in my CV and direct the attention of the reader to the relevant part
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Version ! is incorrect. Version 2 is not wrong, but I find it clumsy.
I would complete the introductory sentence, like this.
Version 3:
"As an analyst in the XXXXXX Team at XXXX (name of company), my experience was as follows.
? Worked with complex grading and reporting systems, manipulating, and interpreting complex data sets
? Analysed and responded to deviations in
I would complete the introductory sentence, like this.
Version 3:
"As an analyst in the XXXXXX Team at XXXX (name of company), my experience was as follows.
? Worked with complex grading and reporting systems, manipulating, and interpreting complex data sets
? Analysed and responded to deviations in
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