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Simpleibr Posted 8 years ago
Letter Writing

Good afternoon! Please revise my letter..Thank you!

Good day!


We, the staff from Villa 3 would like to request to your good office for your financial assistance in settling the unpaid bills as the consequences due to the urgent relocation to 4 Villa.

This matter was discussed already with the Head of RCC, QC Coordinator, CIS QC together with the Accommodation Maintenance In-charge and Accommodation In-charge, in order to solve this problem, we need to submit a formal request, so be it.

For reference, I have enclosed the July and August month unpaid internet bill.


Your prompt action will be highly appreciated…Thank you!

  

Top answer

Your email has some problems. Here is a better version. Good day!

— Clive

  • Your email has some problems.
  • Here is a better version.
  • Good day!
  • <<< Don't say this in a letter or email.
  • Dear Mr Smith, We, the staff from Villa 3 would like to request to your good office for your financial assistance in settling the unpaid bills as the consequences due to the urgent relocation to 4 Villa.
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2 Answers
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Your email has some problems. Here is a better version.

Good day! <<< Don't say this in a letter or email.

Dear Mr Smith,


We, the staff from Villa 3 would like to request to your good office for your financial assistance in settling the unpaid bills as the consequences due to the urgent relocation to 4

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We, the staff from Villa 3 would like to request your financial assistance in settling the unpaid bills incurred as a consequence of the urgent relocation to 4 Villa.

This matter was discussed with the Head of RCC, QC Coordinator, CIS QC together with the Accommodation Maintenance

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