"for me" vs "to me" revisited

Question

Could someone tell me whether both sentences in the following pairs are possible, please? If so, what's the difference? My understanding is that, in general, "for" implies the beneficiary whereas "to" suggests the direction of the action (as in "She lied to/for me"), and this distinction works for me most of the time. But I still can't figure out the ones below. (Though I found a similar question in(on?) the archives, I still don't get it.)
To me, nature is God.
For me, nature is God.
To me as a student, it's not on my list of priorities. For me as a student, it's not on my list of priorities.

Thanks,
mao

Usenet · Accepted Answer

[nq:1]Could someone tell me whether both sentences in the following pairs are possible, please? If so, what's the difference? My ... student, it's not on my list of priorities. For me as a student, it's not on my list of priorities.[/nq]
Mao, is any easier for you to work out if you reverse the order of the phrases? The meaning should be the same, but one may sound right when you have the preposition next to the noun.
It's not on my list of priorities to me as a student. It's not on my list of priorities for me as a student.

The second sounds right, "priorities for" not "priorities to."

The first set of sentences both sound okay to me. Someone can be a "*** to" someone, or also a "*** for" someone.

Best Donna Richoux

Usenet · Answer

[nq:1]The first set of sentences both sound okay to me. Someone can be a "*** to" someone, or also a "*** for" someone.[/nq]
What is the difference? As a nonnative speaker, I fail to see any difference, as a matter of language. If the answer requires an in depth metaphysical inquest, I withdraw the question, because I'm interested only in language this time.

Usenet · Answer

[nq:1]Could someone tell me whether both sentences in the following pairs are possible, please? If so, what's the difference? My ... student, it's not on my list of priorities. For me as a student, it's not on my list of priorities.[/nq]
To me ( or for me), they seem equivalent and equally acceptable. Now if I had said
To my ear,...
then I couldn't have substituted 'for'. It seems that lots of these usages have to be picked up one by one.

john

Usenet · Answer

[nq:2]The first set of sentences both sound okay to me. Someone can be a "*** to" someone, or also a "*** for" someone.[/nq]
[nq:1]What is the difference? As a nonnative speaker, I fail to see any difference, as a matter of language. If the answer requires an in depth metaphysical inquest, I withdraw the question, because I'm interested only in language this time.[/nq]
I don't want to think about this one very hard, either. I don't think declaring things to be gods to or for others comes up very much in ordinary conversation, you know?
Google hits for the construction "a *** to me" considerably outnumber "a *** for me." I don't see any obvious difference in meaning or associated verbs.
If I had to pick, I'd say that "to" suggests that you did the selection of the ***, and "for" suggests it was given to you, or was in some way for your benefit, as mao said. But that's hazy.

Best Donna Richoux

Usenet · Answer

[nq:1]I don't want to think about this one very hard, either. I don't think declaring things to be gods to ... suggests it was given to you, or was in some way for your benefit, as mao said. But that's hazy.[/nq]
Thank you, Donna and John! I feel my understanding has taken a step forward.

The "to" examples were verbatim copies of sentences I came across yesterday. I was just curious, because I would have written them with a "for", and decided ask. No metaphysical discussion was intended.

I always appreciate feedback from the people here.

mao

Usenet · Answer

[nq:1]Could someone tell me whether both sentences in the following pairs are possible, please? If so, what's the difference? My ... similar question in(on?) the archives, I still don't get it.) To me, nature is ***. For me, nature is ***.[/nq]
Those are distinct statements that happen to end up signifying about the same thing.
One of the many meanings of "to" is "in the opinion of", as in "To me, that seems nonsense."
One of the many meanings of "for" is "with regard to; as regards; concerning", as in "He has an ear for music".

To me, nature is ***" = "In my opinion, nature is ***."

For me, nature is ***" = "As regards me ("me" = "my opinion"), nature is ***."
As you see, the meanings are essentially identical. That does not have to be true in general when different prepositions are used it just happens to fall out so in those instances.
[nq:1]To me as a student, it's not on my list of priorities. For me as a student, it's not on my list of priorities.[/nq]
Neither is quite idiomatic, though not owing to the preposition choices, each of which will work satisfactorily there. The openings, "To/For me as a student, it's not . . ." want a different form following, in particular a noun or noun phrase

To/For me as a student, it's not an item with priority.

or something like.
To the extent that there is a tiny shade of difference between the two propositions, the form using "For" is triflingly more assertive: it implies that the following clause here "it's not an item with priority" is a definite fact, and the sentence connects that fact with your status as a student. The form with "To" means instead that the following clause is an opinion that you feel especially sound because your status as a student gives you some special insight into or view of the matter.

Cordially,
Eric Walker
My opinions on English are available at
http://owlcroft.com/english/

Usenet · Answer

[nq:1]Could someone tell me whether both sentences in the following pairs are possible, please? If so, what's the difference? My ... it's not on my list of priorities. For me as a student, it's not on my list of priorities. [/nq]
In the sentences you give as an example, the prepositions 'for' and 'to' aren't used for their usual, literal meaning. For both pairs, the two sentences are correct and mean pretty much the same thing. As used above, the phrase "for me" usually refers to your circumstances or situation, whereas "to me" means the way you understand things, or perceive or feel things.
Example:
"When you come home for dinner, your workday is done. For me, the workday isn't done until the dinner dishes are all washed and the kids are in bed."
It would be wrong to say "To me, the workday isn't done...", because the intended meaning does not relate to how you think or feel, it has to do with the actual situation you're in.
Another example:
"To me, the workday isn't done until my desk is clear." means I feel that I shouldn't go home until all my work tasks are completed.

"For me, the workday isn't done until my desk is clear." might mean that this is the situation for me because of what I believe (thus meaning roughly the same thing as "to me"); or it might mean that regardless of how I feel, I have to stay until the tasks are done (in which case "to me" is not a valid substitute). Context would help determine which meaning is intended.
I couldn't think of a sentence where "for me" couldn't be substituted for "to me", but as above, substituting the other way does not always work.
Hope that helps,

Willondon
AUE FAQ http://www.alt-usage-english.org/intro a.shtml

"for me" vs "to me" revisited

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