First Challege To You

Question

Hello everyone,This is the conclusion of my essay.I just post it here and want to know whether there are some mistakes in this paragraph.If there are some marketing concept  with which you are not familiar, just ignore it.Thanks a million.SummerConclusionThe potential of China's wine market is huge and growing rapidly. Due to the non-convertibility of its currency and ever-increasing development of economy, the Chinese consumer economy has remained buoyant, and consumer spending continues to grow. It is an emerging wine market for most foreign wine exporters to explore: anyone who involve in firstly may capture more share within tactful strategies. Deep research of this different market to well know Chinese customers' consumption habits and culture should be continuous. Only these pioneers who are highly involved and have foreknowledge can be the final victor in this market.For the Australian wine companies, the shortage of Chinese wine market knowledge and practical strategies, effective and efficient distribution system and wine marketers who have both Chinese culture and Australian marketer background will definitely restrict their wine-sales in China.To sum up, opportunities and risks closely exist together in current China's wine market. Neatly utilizing "5P" marketing method of Australian wine products from Australian wine industry will certainly help expand the market and increase market share—Australia has a significant future in the wine market of China.

Summer81318 · Accepted Answer

I have posted it here for 4 days but no any comments untill now,I feel a little disappointed <img class='emoticon' style='Width:19px;Height:19px;' data-delaysrc='https://uat-englishforward-forums-backend.s3.us-west-2.amazonaws.com/Emoticons/6.gif' src='https://uat-englishforward-forums-backend.s3.us-west-2.amazonaws.com/Emoticons/6.gif' alt='Emotion: sad'/>

Robyn Terri · Answer

G'day Summer, I have not got time to do more now, but whatever I have changes to red is wrong and needs re wording.

Conclusion

The potential of China's wine market is huge and growing rapidly. Due to the non-convertibility of its currency and ever-increasing development of economy, the Chinese consumer economy has remained buoyant, and consumer spending continues to grow. It is an emerging wine market for most foreign wine exporters to explore: anyone who involve in firstly may capture more share within tactful strategies. Deep research of this different market to well know Chinese customers' consumption habits and culture should be continuous. Only these pioneers who are highly involved and have foreknowledge can be the final victor in this market.

For the Australian wine companies, the shortage of Chinese wine market knowledge and practical strategies, effective and efficient distribution system and wine marketers who have both Chinese culture and Australian marketer background will definitely restrict their wine-sales in China.

To sum up, opportunities and risks closely exist together in the current China's wine market. Neatly utilizing "5P" marketing method of Australian wine products from Australian wine industry will certainly help expand the market and increase market share—Australia has a significant future in the wine market of China.

Summer81318 · Answer

Alright, Thanks for your mention,I am glad to hear your comments when you have free time.

I just want to modify them as follows:

anyone who (is) involve(d) in this market firstly may capture more(delet it) share within (by or through) tactful strategies. However, deep research about how to know Chinese customers' consumption habits and culture should be continuous.

I would like to modify this sentence like this:

For the Australian wine companies, effective and efficient distribution system, the shortage of Chinese wine market knowledge and practical strategies and wine marketers who have both Chinese culture and Australian marketer background will definitely restrict their wine-sales in China.

Is it better? need your comments.Thanks!

Summer81318 · Answer

up for myself and wait for the elite

Robyn Terri · Answer

Sorry it has taken me so long to get back to you with this, I am not very confident about my suggestions and was hoping someone with more knowlege would do it for you.
Be very careful that what I have written below is what you want to say.
There is alot of information left out of the second paragraph because I am not sure how to include it. The use of the words 'wine marketers' in that sentence does not seem to fit and makes me unsure of how to change it.

The first to get involved in this market could capture a greater share with tactful strategies. Thorough research of Chinese customers' consumption habits and culture should be continuous in this unique market .

Australian wine companies will definitely have their wine-sales in China restricted due to lack of knowledge of the Chinese wine market.

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