Essay Help

For an assignment in our school we have to write an essay based on some stimulus handed to us by the school could you kindly have a look at my story and suggest things i should add to it: The Crash Sometimes when you open your eyes you never know what you see sometimes you wished you could stay like that….. Dead not having to worry about anything in the world. But then the world wakes you up. I stood dumbfounded trying to recall the events of what just happened. My ears ringing and my mouth dry I called for help again and again. But the sound of my voice just echoed through the dark and remote island. That was until I saw a young lady that seamed familiar. I saw her face somewhere but couldn’t tell who she was. When I attempted to stand my leg ached and couldn’t be moved my whole body echoed. In pain I looked down and I realized that large piece of metal had been lodged in my leg. Then I heard the young lady scream: ‘Help I have found the captain, he is gravely wounded and needs medical attention’. Soon after she screamed a man came over and lifted me up I was losing consciences I felt my blood dripping over my pants. I fought to keep myself awake. But then we stopped and I was put down then the temptation stopped but the pain came back. When I looked down a piece of clothing was wrapped around my leg to stop the bleeding. Then I was surrounded by familiar faces. Then one of them said: ‘Are you okay captain?’ I replied:’ I’m fine but where am I and who am I?’ She responded: ‘You are the Captain of flight 259 we had just crashed on this unknown island.’ Then everything came back all the shock and trauma I had just experienced when away and my mind said to myself: ‘I have a job to do!’ Then I called for everyone’s attention. Then I yelled from the top of my voice:’ Survivors we mush salvage everything we can from the plane. Even if it is useless take it here we must take care of one problem at a time.’ After I yelled that out the response were mixed. Some of the people stop crying and headed towards the crash site, others just continued crying and the some just decided to hang back to calm down and the helps other clam down. After a few hours we had a large pile of random things. The survivor’s put everything savaged into two piles: Food and non-food. Then I saw something that made me think I was hallucinating a radio our ticket home. Then when I touched it I felt hopeful, I felt happy, I thought it was all over until. Until the radio didn’t work I felt my heart shatter I felt pain both physically and emotionally. I threw the radio at the ground it made a loud beeping noise and I nearly lost my mind. The other survivors tried to calm me down…..tried. Then I I fell to the ground unconscious. Then I woke up……. I had hoped it was a dream. It wasn’t, I felt pain coming from and unknown source. I saw a boat and two people carrying me on the boat. ‘You’re goanna be okay.’ Said one of the people. On my way to the boat I overheard two people talking about how they found us. One said ‘The loud noise from the radio alerted a nearby coast guard patrol this morning’……….. I had closed my eyes and stopped listening. I was dying. I closed my eyes and remembered my mother, my wife, and my children. My eyes then closed, forever………………………..