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Summer3 Posted 19 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Essay correction: Japan Through (or From or In) My Eyes

0 Dear friends,02br
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00I am a foreigner in Japan. I have to write an essay to show what I feel about Japan and its people. I am giving it below. Please check it and correct the mistakes you find in it. Your suggestions are most welcome. Thanks!02br
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00Essay: (What should be its title? - Japan Through/From/In my Eyes.....which one is correct- through, from or in?)02br
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00Japan, the country known for its technology all over00 the world, a00nd Japanese …00the 00conservative people00 -00 00t00hese are the two things I 00knew00 about 010200 00before I came here00.02br
00Yes, 0100Japan0200 is so technically developed that technology and 010200 can be used interchangeably. There can be no arguments or questions except to accept the fact. 00C00oming to Japanese00 people00…..they are changing now00-a-00day00s,00 though some are still conservative. In fact it’s 00not bad00 to stick to one’s00 own00 culture and tradition.02br
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00After coming here I heard many of my friends saying 00that Japanese00 are not00 very 00social or they are self00-00centered. They don’t mingle with each other00 so easily00 and of course they don’t have time for chit00-00chat.00 00All they are 00concerned with01u00 02u00is00 (?) their work00,00 not who lives next door or who is doing what?02br
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00As for foreigners living in 010200, language is a major barrier to communicate with locals. 00Obviously there will00 always00 be00 the00 communication gap unless foreigners learn 00some 00Japanese. Many of us foreigners have 01i00complaints against them02i00 (01i00here I will add some example02i00) but I would like to 00highlight00 their positive point which is worth sharing.02br
00Japanese people, 00who never 00care who you are and what you do, 00will be the first to help you if 00they see you in some kind of trouble00. 00Despite of the language hurdle 00they strive to help, guide and assist you just to solve your problem. Even if they have to come out of their way to help you they will never hesitate00.00 00Furthermore, the 00people who are so time and work conscious00,00 also will spare their valuable time just to see the person (whom 00they don’t 00even know00 well00 00or 00belong to 00a different00 nationality) out of trouble. How many of the foreigners can say 00it 00proudly that they help00ed00 foreigners in their 00own 00country instead of 00encashing on00 them?02br
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00Almost all of us might have taken help from them but how many of us say thi00s00? Isn’t it socialization…..caring for others and reacting when they are in trouble? Or does socialization just mean spending hours of time together and escape when they really need 00yo00u.00 02br
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Top answer

0Essay: (What should be its title? 02br 02br 02font 00Japan, the country known for its technology all over the world, and Japanese …the conservative people - these are the two things I knew about Japan before I came here. 01font 00[02font 01font 00An awkward structure to this sentence - makes it hard to follow.

  • 0Essay: (What should be its title?
  • 02br 02br 02font 00Japan, the country known for its technology all over the world, and Japanese …the conservative people - these are the two things I knew about Japan before I came here.
  • 01font 00[02font 01font 00An awkward structure to this sentence - makes it hard to follow.
  • "]02br 02font 02br 01del 01font 00Yes,02font 02del 00 Japan is so technically developed that 01font 00the words02font 00 01font 00'02font 00technology01font 00'02font 00 and 01font 00'02font 00Japan01font 00'02font 00 01font 00could almost02font 00 be used interchangeably.
  • 00 01font 00[02font 01font 00Not quite sure what you mean here?
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2 Answers
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0Essay: (What should be its title? - Japan Through/From/In my Eyes.....which one is correct- through, from or in?)02br
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01font00Japan Through My Eyes = your experiences in Japan: your perceptions and view - the better choice of title, in my opinion.02br
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00Japan, the country known for its technology all o
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0 Thank you very much Lil' Ruby Rose. It is really very kind of you taking your precious time and correcting my essay. 02br
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00My best regards.0-

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