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Kanou Posted 11 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Essay correction

Could you help me with this essay? =)

In this day an age, travelling is one of the most desired activities. It is not only a way of spending your vacations, it seems almost a lifestyle for so many people. Which are the factors that contribute to the increase in international travel?

One one hand, we have various methods of transport. There has been a great development in the past few years, not only did they improve their technology and infrastructure, but they’ve also lowered their prices. Thanks to this, you have a variety of means of transport you can choose upon, such as planes, trains and cruises. In addition, travel agencies have attractive offers for our delightment with options according to our interests and budget.

On the other hand, media has an important role in advertising travelling. There are various TV programs that encourage travellers to set out for a journey. They show people from all around the globe; how they live, their jobs, beautiful landscapes, exotic food, festivities, strange traditions, etc. Nonetheless, media isn’t the best way to get followers, in this new era social networks are relatively useful; you can see the photos of your contacts and ask them for advice, or even post links to articles, videos or potcasts about travelling.

On balance, I believe that the factor which contributed most to the increase in international travel is the media related to the social network because it’s a tool which is used among a great number of people, that are not only average users but also travel agencies.
  

Top answer

In this day and age, travelling is one of the most popular desired activities. It is not only a way of spending your one's vacations, it seems almost a lifestyle for so many people. Which What [1] are the factors that contribute to the increase in international travel?

  • In this day and age, travelling is one of the most popular desired activities.
  • It is not only a way of spending your one's vacations, it seems almost a lifestyle for so many people.
  • Which What [1] are the factors that contribute to the increase in international travel?
  • On e one hand, we have there is the increased availability of various methods of transport.
  • There ha ve been a great development s [2] in the past few years, not only in did they improve their travel technology and infrastructure, but they’ve also with lower ed their travel prices being offered all the time .
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4 Answers
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In this day and age, travelling is one of the most popular desired activities. It is not only a way of spending your one's vacations, it seems almost a lifestyle for so many people. Which What [1] are the factors that contribute to the increase in international travel?

One on
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Thank you for the corrections! I have only one question, I understand the rest of the corrections perfectly well =)
teechr popular desired
Why did you cross out desired? Isn't it suitable?
teechr1- Learn the difference between "which" and "what".
I'm going to look it up as soon as possible =)

You are a great help!
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KanouWhy did you cross out desired? Isn't it suitable?
Correct! "Desired" is unsuitable in your context.
Have a look here: http://www.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/english-thesaurus/desired?searchDictCode=english
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teechrCorrect! "Desired" is unsuitable in your context.
Got it! Emotion: yes

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