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Yoong Liat Posted 19 years ago
Grammar
editing of passage
1 b 00 This passage is for Year 2 students. Please edit it for me. Any suggestions to improve it are welcome. Thanks in advance. 02 b 02 br
02 br
02 br
00 Once there was a greedy but clever mouse. Whenever he was hungry, he would go to people’s houses to look for food. 02 br
00 02 br
00 One day, he went to a house. He saw a plate containing milk in front of a cat who appeared to be sleeping soundly. 02 br
00 02 br
00 The mouse thought, “I shall drink the milk before the cat wakes up.” 02 br
00 02 br
00 As he was drinking the milk, the cat suddenly caught him with her right paw. The mouse was frightened but calm. He told the cat, “You must clean your paws first.” 02 br
00 02 br
00 The puzzled cat asked, “Why?” 02 br
00 02 br
00 The mouse replied, “I will taste more delicious if your paws are clean.” 02 br
00 02 br
00 The moment the cat let go of the mouse, he ran away. He told himself, “I am lucky to escape from the cat because she is silly.” 02 br
00 00 The cat thought, “I will never trust any mouse from now on.” 0-
02 br
02 br
00 Once there was a greedy but clever mouse. Whenever he was hungry, he would go to people’s houses to look for food. 02 br
00 02 br
00 One day, he went to a house. He saw a plate containing milk in front of a cat who appeared to be sleeping soundly. 02 br
00 02 br
00 The mouse thought, “I shall drink the milk before the cat wakes up.” 02 br
00 02 br
00 As he was drinking the milk, the cat suddenly caught him with her right paw. The mouse was frightened but calm. He told the cat, “You must clean your paws first.” 02 br
00 02 br
00 The puzzled cat asked, “Why?” 02 br
00 02 br
00 The mouse replied, “I will taste more delicious if your paws are clean.” 02 br
00 02 br
00 The moment the cat let go of the mouse, he ran away. He told himself, “I am lucky to escape from the cat because she is silly.” 02 br
00 00 The cat thought, “I will never trust any mouse from now on.” 0-
Top answer
1 font 00 Hi YL, 02 font 02 br 02 br 00 The mouse was frightened but calm. 01 i 00 At first the mouse was frgihtened but later it got calmer 02 i 00 will be better I think. 02 font 02 br 02 br 00 The moment the cat let go of the mouse, he ran away.
- 1 font 00 Hi YL, 02 font 02 br 02 br 00 The mouse was frightened but calm.
- 01 i 00 At first the mouse was frgihtened but later it got calmer 02 i 00 will be better I think.
- 02 font 02 br 02 br 00 The moment the cat let go of the mouse, he ran away.
- 01 i 00 01 font 00 The moment the cat let the mosue go...
- 02 font 010id 2
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5 Answers
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1 font 00 Hi YL, 02 font 02 br
02 br
00 The mouse was frightened but calm. 01 font 00 How can a creature be frightened and calm at the same time? 01 i 00 At first the mouse was frgihtened but later it got calmer 02 i 00 will be better I think. 02 font 02 br
02 br
00 The
02 br
00 The mouse was frightened but calm. 01 font 00 How can a creature be frightened and calm at the same time? 01 i 00 At first the mouse was frgihtened but later it got calmer 02 i 00 will be better I think. 02 font 02 br
02 br
00 The
00
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0 I think it can still be improved and made more interesting. Sorry I don't have much time to work on this. I hope it will help you to get more creative now. 02 br
02 br
00 [Once there was a greedy and clever mouse. Whenever he was hungry, he would quietly go into the houses in his neighborhood and look for food. 02 br
02 br
00 One day, he went into a h
02 br
00 [Once there was a greedy and clever mouse. Whenever he was hungry, he would quietly go into the houses in his neighborhood and look for food. 02 br
02 br
00 One day, he went into a h
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0 Hi SriSri 02 br
02 br
00 Thanks. You've certainly made the story more interesting. 0-
02 br
00 Thanks. You've certainly made the story more interesting. 0-
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